redfirefaery

i'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. right now, i'm wasting time before i absolutely have to decide if i'm going to go to the church where my friend is a pastor or not. this weekend is the first time he's been approved to do communion. he knows i won't take communion, because he knows my beliefs (and amazingly supports most of them), but he wants a friend there for him to share his accomplishment.

rock... as i have yet to receive results from my doctor as to what has been making me sick, i don't know if i should be going anywhere. i've had a feeling like a stitch in my side, and if the doc confirms that i have mono, she confirms that the pain is my spleen... going anywhere could mean damaging it more, and as far as i know the only way to repair an internal organ is surgery that i don't have money or the want to undergo. but i don't know if this is for certain...

hard place... so now, do i go, alone because spotty doesn't feel she knows him well enough to want to or feel obligated to support him today, and risk the possibility of hurting myself, or do i disappoint and hurt a guy who has been my friend for years?

whatever i do, i need a shower.

later.
♥