rebel84

so last night my bf and i got into a huge fight. we went out with our really good friends and one of them made a joke about me wanting to have a threesome with him and this guy that he works with. now my friend was entirely joking. and if you knew my friends and how we are it was obviously a joke. we all make fun of each other ruthlessly but its really out of love. now my friend thought it was funny because of the irony of it thinking that my bf know that i wouldn't do that. well my friend was also very drunk so he kept saying this to my bf over and over. i wasn't angry cuz i knew he was pretty drunk and that he was joking so i just kept saying that i didn't say it and telling my bf that he was joking because i could tell that my bf was gettin angry. so then my friend asks my bf why he was getting so angry about it and my bf says "cuz i just found out that my gf is a whore". everyone stops talking for a sec and he tells e its time to go and walks out. so i meet him outside and he's realy angry and yelling and i just keep saying "but why did you call me a whore?" adn he keeps saying that its because he didn't think that a joke about fucking his gf was funny. so i decide that i don't want to ride home with him like that and my friends give me a ride. i called him this morning and he actually tried to say that it was all my fault because i didn't stop our friend from saying it.so now we're broken up i guess but we've been talking all day.

now i totally understand if he was not liking the joke but what am i supposed to do? our friend was really drunk. and i wasn't gonna get in a fight with him. i knew he wasn;t serious and that he would drop it eventually. my bf was just mad that i wasn't as mad as he was. but i wasn't encouraging it. i kept telling my bf that he was joking it wasn't true. that my friend was drunk. so how dos that make me a whore? and he blurted it out in front of everyone we were with. the jaws dropped.

so this morning when i called him he acted like ii was annoying him. ike it was no big deal. but when i said that i wasn't sure if it was worth it for us to keep this going then everything changes. now its me not wanting to fix things. now i;m not giving him a chance. but why should i? we've been fighting for like 2 months. over this kind of thiing, i'm super confused and don't know what to do. i fel like my bf is a different person. last night i was in shock. i would have never thought that he would say something like that. we've been together for 2 yrs. he's never been like that. and we've talked about this alot. i feel like sometimes he tells me that he understands how i feel just cuz he's scared i'll leave. but its not really a priority. he gets really mad all the time and says really mean stuff. its almost like he flips out really easy. and always at me.the freak outs are getting a little fewer but now when the happen they are way worse. like calling me a whore to all of our friends. he says he didn't mean it that he was just mad at the guys but why is it so easy to do something like that to me?
thats kind of sad. but he didn't really say anything to them. thats what i think is funny. he acted like he was so offended that they would say something like that about me so instead of setting him straight he chimes in?
i'm totally not mad that he was upset but i don't get why he said something to me instead of them.

it was just a totally fucked up situation. its making me feel like love is impossible and that really all you have is yourself. i'm worried tht if i take him back that this wil just get worse. and that i'm a fool for believing him. i don't know what to do. how many chances do you give some one? it was never like this before.i literally feel like he ust switches and i don't know what triggers it. we used to work so well before. now we can't go out without fighting. its like everytime we do. and it doesn't matter whar happens that night he will always be mad at me.

i'm just lost and it feels good to write about it. he'll robably read this though and be mad tht i wrote a blog about it but what else is new?