Thursday Apr 12, 2012

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I really feel as though I am at the end of my sanity rope. To put it blatantly being an adult sucks ass! I miss the days of being a child and mommy and daddy could always make it better, or even a teenager when it only felt like the end of the world and I still believed in my dreams. Well now I am mommy and I have no idea how to make anything better. My life has turned out to be everything I NEVER wanted it to be. Every time I take a step forward something pushes me 10 steps back. I feel like Im in a hole trying to dig out but with every inch I climb more dirt just keeps falling in on my head. I have run out of ways to make things better. When will the universe stop sabotaging my efforts. Im at a loss and feel completely helpless and hopeless. I have to be strong for my baby...
daorby:
Hey. I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time. What you wrote about wanting the safety of childhood / teenage years resonates with me. Whenever I feel like giving up or whenever I get too bogged down thinking about the 'safer' past, I remind myself that I had a load of struggles when I was a teenager too; it wasn't all fun and sunshine at all! This might not sound particularly comforting, but at least it reminds me that I have survived tough times in the past and that I am capable of surviving struggles.

Also, I am sure, I am absolutely certain, that some day your baby is going to appreciate all the struggles you are going through right now. Hang in there.

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