granpa made some bread tonight, kids. now if i can just make it home without stopping at a dice game, it will all be good. sadness is still the main type of mood in this situation, this should be an up moment but sometimes all you can do is feel it, it shoulda been different, it coulda been, but it ain't, a year of betrayal, murder and a few empty seats just because of fate. sorry for that attitude, but when you finally have somethin' to share and the main folks you want to share it with are no longer there anymore then it is hard to be all ecstatic. you just want to quietly count your money and go pay some bills. take care of your best friends fatherless son, try to close the gap with your own kids, try to heal a lil', cuz' lifes storms know no seasons, you have to steel yourself against defeat and sometimes you even have to steel yourself over a victory. if life is a game then they keep most of the rules hidden and the score is never easy to ascertain. tonight we remember the fallen, tomorrow we bury the dead. peace@love from the murder capitol of america.....raze the dead, start the party...
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