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rayraythemanape

Member Since 2006

Followers 200 Following 198

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Saturday Apr 28, 2012

Apr 28, 2012
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Sometimes.

I hate being me.

I just received a bundle of packages from my family for my Birthday.

They were sent at different areas, ish. But all arrived on the same day. I got Doctor Who season 3 & 5 as well as Season 3 & 4 of Lexx and an a copy of The Old Curiosity Shop from 78 with a Certificate of Authenticity from The Old Curiosity Shop in London.

Now, as the packages all came on the same day I start thinking my Mom is back at handing my siblings gifts having them sign a card and putting them in the mail to convince me that they care. Second, the copy of Lexx Season 3 & 4 was reviewed as being the worst copy out there, very grainy and choppy. So, as one of the copies of Who have a sticker from Bestbuy I run with the hunch that it too is from Bestbuy. I call them up and ask if I can return it for store credit or some such in order to put toward the purchase of something I would rather have.

They look up the purchase under my Sisters last name and ask me to verify her first name, I tell me and they have no record of her I then give them my Mom's name and Boom they find it. Now, I should have left it alone but my mind pushes me on. I return the DVD set and ask the lady at the counter, who by the way put it back on my Mom's card without me asking, if she could print me out a gift receipt for all of the purchases on the receipt. . .

Bam, all of my siblings gifts on the same receipt.

I hate being me.

My Mom is broke, my gifts total over $200. Worse? I recently had a conversation about her gifting things to people under my siblings name. Its dishonest. It gives people the impression that my siblings actually care about them when in fact they are selfish people who care little to nothing about anyone else.

I came to tears in my car on the way home because I am angry, I mean furiously angry, over someone trying to be kind to me. About my inability not to look for the truth, that I can't just smile and think that someone out there loves me and cares enough to think of me.

I wish I could just be an idiot every once in while.
VIEW 16 of 16 COMMENTS
capote:
Happy Birthday Ray.
Apr 30, 2012
cockzombie:
sad blog.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!

Love,
Me and my sisters kiss
Apr 30, 2012

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