rotten fucking morning--some low-level wierdness & sort of a dull, hopefully baseless, terror.
to begin with, I have 3 cats. they used to belong to my grandmother & she loved them more than anything. when she passed away I took them on & I love them more than anything.
one of them is missing.
I have a fenceless yard & all my cats meander around the neighborhood a bit but for the most part they tend to stay in the yard, in the house or (usually) directly underfoot (especially if I'm in a hurry to get to the bathroom or answer the phone)
I work a 12-hour, graveyard shift at the prison on the weekends, so during those days I work six pm-six am & the rest of the time I sleep & putter around the house a bit.
yesterday it registered that I hadn't seen Flopper (so named because he's a big fluffy gray Persian with a habit of frequently "flopping" on his back with all four legs in the air to get his belly rubbed & will, if the rubber in question changs position somewhat, stand up, shift to a more advantageous position, & re-flop) in a while--maybe a few hours, maybe a day or two--sort of like a background noise that you become used to--& then stop hearing, & can't precisely say when it was you stopped hearing it.
anyway, Flopper is ALWAYS around--& now he's not. & I'm worried.
(I would consider myself a cat-lover, but not the type to get all soppy about them--dressing them up & what-have-you; for the most part they shift for themselves & tolerate my presence as long as I keep the Friskies coming good & regular. anyway, this is the first time in the 3 years or so that they been in my care--or vice-versa--that the alarm bells have gone off & I've gotten worried about one of them.)
that's the dull, hopefully baseless terror: that something bad has happened to him.
the wierdness came when I called T in Wisconsin.
not sure what's going on between us, but there's something there. we've made out, we've told each other we love each other, slept together (platonically), talked about moving in together, traveled great distances to visit one another, talk at least an hour or two a week.
anyway, she's in Wisconsin & I'm here in Nevada.
anyway, I called & a man answered the phone.
I know the phone is right next to her bed.
he put her on & she was just waking up. (she's probably the sexiest waker-upper I've ever known.)
I told her what was going on.
anyway, there was a party at her place the night before.
the wierdness is: well, it was kind of wierd. on the one hand--she probably had bit of a tussle with the dude.
on the other hand: I've had a couple of tussles myself since we started whatever the hell it is we have. (only twice, but it hasn't exactly been for lack of trying)
anyway, a shitty morning.
to begin with, I have 3 cats. they used to belong to my grandmother & she loved them more than anything. when she passed away I took them on & I love them more than anything.
one of them is missing.
I have a fenceless yard & all my cats meander around the neighborhood a bit but for the most part they tend to stay in the yard, in the house or (usually) directly underfoot (especially if I'm in a hurry to get to the bathroom or answer the phone)
I work a 12-hour, graveyard shift at the prison on the weekends, so during those days I work six pm-six am & the rest of the time I sleep & putter around the house a bit.
yesterday it registered that I hadn't seen Flopper (so named because he's a big fluffy gray Persian with a habit of frequently "flopping" on his back with all four legs in the air to get his belly rubbed & will, if the rubber in question changs position somewhat, stand up, shift to a more advantageous position, & re-flop) in a while--maybe a few hours, maybe a day or two--sort of like a background noise that you become used to--& then stop hearing, & can't precisely say when it was you stopped hearing it.
anyway, Flopper is ALWAYS around--& now he's not. & I'm worried.
(I would consider myself a cat-lover, but not the type to get all soppy about them--dressing them up & what-have-you; for the most part they shift for themselves & tolerate my presence as long as I keep the Friskies coming good & regular. anyway, this is the first time in the 3 years or so that they been in my care--or vice-versa--that the alarm bells have gone off & I've gotten worried about one of them.)
that's the dull, hopefully baseless terror: that something bad has happened to him.
the wierdness came when I called T in Wisconsin.
not sure what's going on between us, but there's something there. we've made out, we've told each other we love each other, slept together (platonically), talked about moving in together, traveled great distances to visit one another, talk at least an hour or two a week.
anyway, she's in Wisconsin & I'm here in Nevada.
anyway, I called & a man answered the phone.
I know the phone is right next to her bed.
he put her on & she was just waking up. (she's probably the sexiest waker-upper I've ever known.)
I told her what was going on.
anyway, there was a party at her place the night before.
the wierdness is: well, it was kind of wierd. on the one hand--she probably had bit of a tussle with the dude.
on the other hand: I've had a couple of tussles myself since we started whatever the hell it is we have. (only twice, but it hasn't exactly been for lack of trying)
anyway, a shitty morning.