If you've been following my career for a while you may be aware that for several years I was very underweight, around 79 pounds at my lowest. I had an eating disorder called anorexia nervosa which controlled my whole life- relationships, health, happiness. Due to some difficult past experiences my brain used an obsession with weight and food to make me feel like I had some power over my life, but it just made me a very sad and insecure person unable to reach her full potential.
These shots are from a set from the difficult times (I aim to remove these early ones soon as they no longer represent me, as much as I love the photography by shannon swift). I went to great lengths to hide the fact my bones were sticking out in all kinds of places, my face was gaunt and none of my bras fit. The funny thing about anorexia is that you know you look bad, but changing that is basically a failure according to the illness.
In December 2016 I began the process of rcovery. My relationship was on the rocks and I knew I had to get better if I was going to keep the person I loved by my side. It took over a year to recover in body and mind, and in some sense I'll always be recovering. But I'm now a healthy weight, going on adventures, feeling good about my appearance.
I'm excited for you all to see this set by @casca when it comes out next month! I look healthy and comfortable in my own skin as I have since my first set of the day! I'm very lucky to be able to share this life experience with you all!
@missy @rambo
