randomrockstar

I saw that movie a long, long time ago... must see it again! Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think there was an Alice's Restaurant part 2 song, right? Maybe I'm just crazy...

More on landlord bashing... a few years ago, I lived in a building where the landlord's mother lived down stairs (little old Italian lady who spoke no English). She had the entire first floor to herself and a friend, big. It was in the dead of winter on New Year eve and I was without head for something like 2 or 3 days, and it was fucking freezing. Was the landlord anywhere to be found? Nope. Called his home and left countless messages, called his cell phone and left more messages... the little bugger was nowhere to be found. I was coming in from going to the store and my neighbor beside me came out and asked me if my heat was off as well.. I mean she was wearing her coat, hat and mittens in her apartment! Enough was enough... eventhough it was New Year's Eve, I marched downstairs to talk to his freaking mother! She opened the door a crack, saying "Who is? Who is?!" Well, since I didn't (and still don't) know how to say, "your fucking son turned off our fucking heat 3 fucking days ago!" in Italian, I was limited to "Nicky... Where is? Me, no heat! No heat 3 days!". She kept saying, "No Nicky, No Nicky" meaning that her son wasn't there... on top of that, I felt LOTS of heating coming out of that apartment of hers (you know how old people like it hot...). After trying to argue with her for about a minute or 2, I hear in the background, "Mom? Who is it?" And who should come to the door? Nicky. The little fucker was there the whole time! I could've punched his lights out... I told him about how no one in the building had heat, and he was like, "Well why didn't you let me know? I did some work on the heater... I' must have forgotten to turn it back on". Bastard.

I didn't there another year, that's for sure... Sorry for being so long-winded... I hate landlords just as much as you, I think!

Man... who needs 'em! Ok, ONE last slumlord story (a short one, I promise!). One of my best friends back in college had the creepiest, dirty old man as her landlord who was a total letch. He honestly believed that he had the right to "check on" the apartments of his tenants because it was his building. And he did exactly that. She started to notice that her underwear and bras were disappearing... when he was the only other one who had a key. One time, she was taking a shower and he fucking walked into her apartment and into the bathroom!!!! Can you fucking believe it?! He claimed that he knocked and no one answered, and that he had to "check the meters". Right!! And if that wasn't enough, he came to collect the rent and she explained that she'd be a couple days late, and he said that she could pass on the rent that month if she "took care of him". OH MY FUCKING GOD! Needless to say, she paid the rent and that was her last month there... My friend ended up crazy gluing the locks to his apartment (he lived in the building) and his car, and also filled his gas tank with sugar.

Ok, that's the last one... I promise. I tell ya, when I get going...