I'm sure I'm like a lot of people who despise Microsoft Word and its
damn annoying green squiggly line telling me how bad I suck at grammar and sentence structure. "Fragment, consider revising"? How about you fragment your ass and consider keeping your nose out of my business. There is a webpage that says it a lot better than I can, you should read the rantings of someone even more annoyed than me.
However, explain this wonder to me if you could. I've never been an expert when it comes to apostrophe usage, hence a lot of my greensquiggly repremands in Word. My tactic is usually to leave out any apostrophes and let Word take care of it. After all it is SOOOOO smart when it comes to the English language. I use the word 'Whats', as in "Good evening Sweetness, what's for dinner tonight?" Of course this is not correct and it gets a green squiggle telling me how bad I suck. What, though, is their suggestion for the word I really meant? 'Whets', thats what, as in, "my, that steak looks delicious, it really whets my appitite". 'What's' is second on the list. First off, doing a google search 'what's' comes up 366,000,000 times, where as 'whets' comes up 85,300 times. Statistically then there is a 99.98% chance I meant 'what's' rather than 'whets'. What probably bugs me even more than that is that we go through this little charade at least once a day and have done for the past 5 years. "Do you mean 'whets'?" asks Word. "What the fuck do you think I mean Word? What did I mean the last 10,000 times we have discussed this? Do you have shares in the word 'whets' and are trying to make a little money? Do you have a thing for 'whets'' Mother who promised to put out only if you got 'whets' a good job in a nice stable business document? Tell me, tell me now, before something pops in my brain and they find me slumped
over the desk, blood dripping into my keyboard.
Still, whets a boy to do?Go to the second entry
damn annoying green squiggly line telling me how bad I suck at grammar and sentence structure. "Fragment, consider revising"? How about you fragment your ass and consider keeping your nose out of my business. There is a webpage that says it a lot better than I can, you should read the rantings of someone even more annoyed than me.
However, explain this wonder to me if you could. I've never been an expert when it comes to apostrophe usage, hence a lot of my greensquiggly repremands in Word. My tactic is usually to leave out any apostrophes and let Word take care of it. After all it is SOOOOO smart when it comes to the English language. I use the word 'Whats', as in "Good evening Sweetness, what's for dinner tonight?" Of course this is not correct and it gets a green squiggle telling me how bad I suck. What, though, is their suggestion for the word I really meant? 'Whets', thats what, as in, "my, that steak looks delicious, it really whets my appitite". 'What's' is second on the list. First off, doing a google search 'what's' comes up 366,000,000 times, where as 'whets' comes up 85,300 times. Statistically then there is a 99.98% chance I meant 'what's' rather than 'whets'. What probably bugs me even more than that is that we go through this little charade at least once a day and have done for the past 5 years. "Do you mean 'whets'?" asks Word. "What the fuck do you think I mean Word? What did I mean the last 10,000 times we have discussed this? Do you have shares in the word 'whets' and are trying to make a little money? Do you have a thing for 'whets'' Mother who promised to put out only if you got 'whets' a good job in a nice stable business document? Tell me, tell me now, before something pops in my brain and they find me slumped
over the desk, blood dripping into my keyboard.
Still, whets a boy to do?Go to the second entry
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
They have 3? Why don't I have one?
REGAL!