My apologies for not posting lately, but I am NOT as young as I used to be. I have a new client that is happily married, except that her husband is not a 'sexual' person. Even at the beginning, he was only marginally interested in sex, and his drive has gone down substantially since. That is to say, she has had no sexual contact with him what-so-ever for 2+years. She has always had a healthy sex drive, so this is a real problem for her.
I gather that in all other ways, he is a loving, caring husband. He doesn't beat her, cheat on her, gamble their rent money away, doesn't rotate jobs every 6 weeks, is a great father, remembers her birthday and their anniversary blah blah blah.
Yes, they tried counceling, and the conclusion was that he just isn't intersted in sex.
First, couples - if you don't have a healthy sex-life then you don't have a healthy relationship. Period. It is not, in my opinion, the sign of a healthy person if they are not also a sexual person. If your not a 'sexual' person, you need to figure out why and get some therapy around it. It's not fair to your spouse, who probably has 'needs' that are not being fulfilled - or are being fulfilled by someone else.
Second, a woman with a healthy sex life, but no sexual contact with another person for 2+ years...now that's an intimidating thing. I am NOT as young as I used to be, and this poor woman seriously wore me out. I won't belabor the details, but suffice to say that if I'd been 17, this would have been a challenge. Many of the men in my profession use performance enhancers, but I've never used them. It feels like cheating, but I may have to reconsider....man, the humility of getting older, huh. There are men who do this into their 50's and 60's, but it's hard to imagine doing this that long.
So, as to how I got started in this....
As I said, up until about 5 or 6 years ago I was absolutely horrible in bed. Really, really bad. Then, and I don't know why, but something just clicked and I started to 'get' women. I sort of 'understood' what women want without really knowing how I know. I just know. Wierd, huh.
Anyway, also about this time, I started hooking up with what is sometimes called 'fuck buddies'. Women I would definately call friends, but with whom I also had a no-strings-attached sexual relationship. More than one of them said I should think about doing it professionally, such was my talent. Then, one of my 'friends' recommended me to a friend of hers who wanted to hire a male escort but was afraid of getting someone random...I came with a testemonial, so to speak. I did some research on rates, policies, dos-and-don'ts - that type of thing, and then signed my soul over. It's been largely word-of-mouth since then. I've put a little ad up on a few sites from time to time, but the screening process is alot more difficult without a reference so I don't do much of that.
I've got a few other points to make, but this is enough for now....more coming later...
I gather that in all other ways, he is a loving, caring husband. He doesn't beat her, cheat on her, gamble their rent money away, doesn't rotate jobs every 6 weeks, is a great father, remembers her birthday and their anniversary blah blah blah.
Yes, they tried counceling, and the conclusion was that he just isn't intersted in sex.
First, couples - if you don't have a healthy sex-life then you don't have a healthy relationship. Period. It is not, in my opinion, the sign of a healthy person if they are not also a sexual person. If your not a 'sexual' person, you need to figure out why and get some therapy around it. It's not fair to your spouse, who probably has 'needs' that are not being fulfilled - or are being fulfilled by someone else.
Second, a woman with a healthy sex life, but no sexual contact with another person for 2+ years...now that's an intimidating thing. I am NOT as young as I used to be, and this poor woman seriously wore me out. I won't belabor the details, but suffice to say that if I'd been 17, this would have been a challenge. Many of the men in my profession use performance enhancers, but I've never used them. It feels like cheating, but I may have to reconsider....man, the humility of getting older, huh. There are men who do this into their 50's and 60's, but it's hard to imagine doing this that long.
So, as to how I got started in this....
As I said, up until about 5 or 6 years ago I was absolutely horrible in bed. Really, really bad. Then, and I don't know why, but something just clicked and I started to 'get' women. I sort of 'understood' what women want without really knowing how I know. I just know. Wierd, huh.
Anyway, also about this time, I started hooking up with what is sometimes called 'fuck buddies'. Women I would definately call friends, but with whom I also had a no-strings-attached sexual relationship. More than one of them said I should think about doing it professionally, such was my talent. Then, one of my 'friends' recommended me to a friend of hers who wanted to hire a male escort but was afraid of getting someone random...I came with a testemonial, so to speak. I did some research on rates, policies, dos-and-don'ts - that type of thing, and then signed my soul over. It's been largely word-of-mouth since then. I've put a little ad up on a few sites from time to time, but the screening process is alot more difficult without a reference so I don't do much of that.
I've got a few other points to make, but this is enough for now....more coming later...
twwly:
If you don't have a healthy sex life, then you're just friends. Period.
