I hate mornings before work. I hate my job. Everyone at my job hates me. I spend each day wondering why they havent found a reason to fire me yet. I want to finish this novel but I am too tired when I get home. I am so exhausted. I stopped caring and decided to give up calling the record people back. Screw them! I am tired.
Last night a girl I am.. was friends with told me to delete her from my phone. She didnt have a reason, just that she couldnt handle being my friend in such a chaotic life. Told me I need to grow up. She was the second girl to tell me that in two weeks. I havent left my house since the first one said it. Now I dont think I will leave my house again. Sobering all of this far too sobering.
Meanwhile I dont want to talk to any of my other friends because I am sick of them, and because there is a part of me that thinks if these two think this about me, then maybe they all do too and they are lying to me. Wtf kinda logic is that? SO I dont call them and oddly enough they havent called me. It weird it s like they know though I never told any of them that I didnt want to hear from them. Usually my fone rings off the hook, but it has been silenced for days.
I am throwing a rave with Dig Dug on the 17th , I hope I can pull myself back together by then.
Last night a girl I am.. was friends with told me to delete her from my phone. She didnt have a reason, just that she couldnt handle being my friend in such a chaotic life. Told me I need to grow up. She was the second girl to tell me that in two weeks. I havent left my house since the first one said it. Now I dont think I will leave my house again. Sobering all of this far too sobering.
Meanwhile I dont want to talk to any of my other friends because I am sick of them, and because there is a part of me that thinks if these two think this about me, then maybe they all do too and they are lying to me. Wtf kinda logic is that? SO I dont call them and oddly enough they havent called me. It weird it s like they know though I never told any of them that I didnt want to hear from them. Usually my fone rings off the hook, but it has been silenced for days.
I am throwing a rave with Dig Dug on the 17th , I hope I can pull myself back together by then.
Dunno why but maybe you'll understand those two girls more then. If not at lest it may make you feel better about life... sure made me feel better about mine.
Saying "grow up" is like saying "damn it ! Stop fucking around and wasting your gifts cause if I had them I would be so muchmore successful than I am now.
Usually they are just jealous but they are also usually right about stop fucking around part ...
nothing wrong about writing your novel when your fifty if you want to but dont put it just to prove yourself right and them wrong. that doesnt make sense sorry I am really tired.
I mean i wish I had some friends that cared enough to kick me in my ass when they thought I needed it.