raged44

I have never known what I wanted to do with my life. I am getting older and it seems to be a pressing issue now. Like I have to make some kind of decision. I have done so many things and liked them. And it seems there are so many opportunities for me. I have a band which my get a record deal. I have almost finished my novel, which will probably get published since I have already worked on several true life serial killer novel. I keep job offers from newspapers because of my journalism media degree. It just all seems like its would be easy.

Yet I choose to sit here on the fence working at a lumber yard. Loading wood. Yea for me! My friend burl who writes novels says that all great people have to find themselves before they grow up. He says I am just taking longer because I am not ready to let go of being a boy. He is probably right.

I work all week to make money to pay for my real life which is parties PARTIES PARTIES PARTIES!!! Is there more? I dont hink I know for sure I have been doing it since I was fifteen at and honestly I can no linger remember before it. Some how it feels criminal. Like I am cheating. Each weekend I look at my disco biscuits and swear this is the last. This is the weekend before I grow up. Doom on me doom doom doom

I need to grow up but I am afraid if I do I will be a lonely adult instead of a crazy freaky party kid.

I go to Robot Parade on Sat.
.. doom