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raeof_sunshine

Member Since 2008

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Friday Nov 14, 2008

Nov 13, 2008
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Okay so here it is, after everything that's happened to me this time around I'm seriously considering that there actually may be some kind of God. I know, don't yell at me but my whole life I didn't believe in Him but there are some reasons to why I haven't. Who takes the mother of two very small children, a wife and a nurse who cared for small children infected and usually born with AIDS. Who does that? Who allows a small child to get raped and kiddnapped by a man that she was soposed to be able to trust? Who lets world hunger and war happen letting millions of innocent people suffer?

My father strongly and vocally does not believe in God. He was my everything and I'm pretty sure I didn't want to displease him, and to be honest I wanted to do everything he did. I kid you not.

But now that I am away from my extremly judgemental family and having MORE than enough time to think about this topic, And I really do think there may be a God. Maybe we suffer so the good in our lives mean that much more, and we are that much more grateful.

There was over a 60% chance that I would never ever walk again. And and even greater chance that I'd never work again, never have children due to the lack of mobility and healing. I ran to Mark the other day when I knew I'd be able to return to work. My neurosurgeon is baffeled by how speedy my recovery has been and how well I pulled through.

I jumped off a cliff and missed, and didn't die.
I've had my heart stopped twice and came back with no complications and didn't die.
I've gone through a windshield at 55 mph and kissed the pavement and didn't die.

Someone explain to me how you go 21 years not believing then one day go wow, how am i still alive?? Is someone looking over me? Tell me what you think.

Please if you comment on this blog please consider how hard and confusing this must be for me.

I love you guys. biggrin
skullgrid:
i have no idea what to say.

i certainly haven't survived any near-tragedies to that extent to alter my perspective in any significant way... and religion was more or less forced on me until my teenage years, at which point i rebelled against it rather vehemently...

these days, my beliefs i think are more based in karma than anything else, i.e. the more good you do, the more good will happen to you. i feel like i've been pretty lucky in some ways and although i can occasionally be an asshole, i also feel like i'm generally pretty good to most people. who knows.

my view on the idea of any type of higher power is like this: some people NEED faith, something outside themselves to believe in. if that gets you through, then great. more power to you. for me personally, i figure: if there's anything after this life, i'll find out about it when this life ends. but i don't want to waste time or oppourtunities in THIS life in favor of worrying about the next one... if that makes sense.

believe in yourself and be as good as you can to others.

so if i apply that to you, i;d say you must've done some pretty amazing things in your life to be as blessed and as lucky as you are now smile
Nov 14, 2008
paxton:
I have believed both ways. I guess I'm just cynical now that I'm older.
What ever you what to believe is good. You can only answer the question
Nov 15, 2008

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