I knew it would happen eventually. My ex has decided to make contact. She texted me tonight saying she was thinking about me and that she knows we both hurt each other a lot and that she hopes I'm well. I have been well ever since I broke up with her back in March. Maybe I hurt her by breaking up with her, but she put me through so many terrible things that I don't want to have anything to do with her. Something that is made difficult by her dating one of my coworkers.
I can't be drawn back into her bullshit, I really can't. While we were together she was in the psych ward 4 times, tried to kill herself twice and left a suicide note on my voicemail while I was working. I broke up with her the first time after those two attempts due to my being in a constant state of depression and anxiety that the next call, the next text, would be someone telling me that she had succeeded. She swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills as a result. She then manipulated me into getting back together with her. At one point I also had to drag her out of the home of a woman she met in the psych ward. She let my ex drink all day then gave her a vicodin like drug that made her pass out. I couldn't wake her up for almost 15 minutes, calling her name and lightly slapping her cheek. I told her the next morning that she had better not do that again or I'm gone cause I'm not waking up next to a corpse. I really regret not remembering this woman's address so I could call CPS on her. She gave my ex cocaine on another occasion and she has kids in the house living with this.
I have finally started living and taking care of myself again since the break up. Working 9 hours a day and not being able to come home and sit and relax because she needed me to take care of her. I wasn't taking care of myself, I didn't see family, or friends. I can live for myself again. I may not be perfect but I am thankful for that relationship. It has shown me what I deserve in a relationship. To be treated with love and respect just the same as I give. So no I will not respond, I will not be drawn back into the darkness. I have finally stepped out into the light, into the warmth, and I am not turning back. This is the dawn of a new chapter in my life and I am excited for what is coming, and who is coming into it...
Thanks for letting me vent.
