quietdesperation

i have returned with a bit of reluctance after a few years away. i was informed that someone out there wanted me back enough to pay for a short term subscription. The cynic in me thinks this is just a marketing ploy in hard times to manipulate the ever needy male ego, but what the hey. whatever the motive it is always nice to look at so many creative and beautiful gutsy women and to think one of them was interested enough in may to make the jesture. my reluctance stems in part from the illusory nature of the SG experience. i do not take fondly to frustration and teasing which is what a lot of this is. the reality of the male/female experience is so often laden with fear of vulnerability and a great deal of posturing. life is passing as we all maneuver to get or needs met without taking a risk or giving up too much to have it happen. whoever that special person was, if you indeed exist, thank you. i will make all the effort i can to bury the cynic and let my ego bask in the sunshine of at least quiet desire!