quickley

In lieu of a real update... 'cause I'm lazy...

the thing that's been goin' round...

1. As *nsync would say, God must have spent a little more time on you. What, exactly, did God spend more time on?

My perception, my ability to read people, my instincts. (s)he said "We'll get this one right, so we don't have to worry about 'er"

2. If you had to start your own war against something, what would it be and why? Also, what would the protesters do in protest, to show they think your war is evil?

I wage a holy war against ignorance and close-mindedness. The protesters, in protest, shut up, and be quiet.

3. In the movie of your life, who would play you and who would play your lover?

Julianne Moore plays me, and if it's the story of MY life... well, no one actor can play my lover.

4. What flavor of diet coke do you next want?

Coke flavored. As opposed to Aspartame flavored, like it currently is.

5. Insert picture of what you think is the best.hair.ever.


I'm avoiding the pic thing... 'cause I haven't met the best hair, or the cutest thing ever, or whatever. No, I'm just lazy.

6. If girls had penises and boys had vaginas, who would you date/fuck?

Doubt it would change a thing.

7. Have you ever farted in public? if so, what were the circumstances?

Likely.

8. Tell one crazy I cant believe how drunk I was story.

I'm pretty well behaved, actually. Especially when drunk.
One of my first drunken adventures in High School, all I remember is getting into a friend's dad's truck, as he drove me home. In the morning, my parents said "Why is it that you opened the window in the laundry room and cranked the thermostat as far as it would go? And what's that wet towel doing in the bathtub?"
To this day, I still have no idea.

9. Ideal Christmas stocking?

Chocolate, socks, black uniball pens, art supplies, gift certificates for books and music.

10. Who is Britney Spears soul mate?

Who freakin' cares?

11. What is the one book you think everyone should read?

I dunno, my book recommendations tend to be very reader-specific. Le Petit Prince.

12. At your heaviest, how much did you weigh?

225

13. Ever puked and run?

In a flower bed, on my 22nd birthday. Cabs saw me and fled.

14. Tell one "too tired to finish masturbating" story.

Do these things have stories? It tends to go... "hmmm... I'm too tired." and then I stop. Then again, if I'm too tired, I'm unlikely to start.

15. Write down three true facts, and one lie. Don't tell us which one is the lie.

1) I play the digeridoo. Although I don't think I can spell it.
2) As a child, I was often mistaken for a boy
3) I'm a broken man on a halifax pier.
4) I enjoy cheese in all its varieties.

16. Insert your favorite cute/cuddly picture (just to make us smile).

No. If my witty word aren't enough to make you smile, you cannot be saved.

17. If you cooked a dinner for someone you were head over heels in love with, what would you cook?

Their favorite. Better than their mom makes it.

18. If you had to write something on your forehead and walk around with it all day, what would it be?

Be Nice.

19. What is your favorite piece of art, and would you please post a picture of it below?

There's a Lichtenstein sculpture I saw at the MET that I've never been able to get out of my head.

20. Would you have sex with Xena, Warrior Princess? What would it be like? Also, if you said no, are you crazy? What are your reasons for declining?

No, yes, I am crazy, and I guess she's just not my type.

21. Whats your favorite animal? show us.

I've got a thing for fishes. It's a vestige of my angsty-goth Sandman obsessed days.

22. If you were a color, what color would you be? Why?

Red. Self-explanatory.

23. What turns you on? If it invovles a ball gag, please describe.

Good conversation. Soft lips, strong noses.

24. On a scale of 1 to 10, how dumb is it to decline the above question by answering 'that's too personal'?

Ten.

25. Why are ball gags sexy?

Because they are smooth, round, and red, and go in my mouth. So I've got a bit of an oral fixation. Not a bad thing.

26. Do you have any personal opinions on ice trays?

They're really hard to clean. At least, mine are.

27. What's the most painful thing you've ever had done to you/done to another person during sex?

I had my head put through a wall once, while at it doggy-style. Was strangely satisfying, but not something that I'll let happen again.

28. If you had to be stranded for the rest of your life on a desert island and pick one person to go with you, would you pick someone you could really talk to or someone who gave you the best sex of your life? If you say both, youre a fucking whore.

Certainly couldn't have the best sex of my life with someone I couldn't really talk to. I'd go for conversation, every time.

29. What is the biggest insult someone could tell you?

I am always deeply insulted whenever anyone accuses me of lying about how I don't lie. I don't. Fuck you. It's hard, too.

Anyone tells me I'm not an artist.

30. If you were/are a big dyke, would you wear the strap on or would your partner?

Oh, there's totally gotta be some switch action going on, here. Only fair. Don't do to others what you wouldn't have done to yourself.