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qfreak69

Hell's Kitcken, Az.

Member Since 2004

Followers 206 Following 299

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Friday May 17, 2013

May 17, 2013
1
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PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME GET ROSE BACK.frownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrownfrown

I hope that someone that reads this blog has the compassion in their heart to help me. I am not good at telling a woman, or knowing words to say that will let her see. Those things I have said to her were to show her how much I am in love with her. I fell in love with her the first time I saw her face. I help her come to the United States to marry another man. You don't know how much that hurt, you can't. I have over the last years help her through a divorce with that man. Help pay her rent when she needed it. I sent her baskets when she was cold, and even brought her a laptop computer. She always would say I was a father figure to her, when it was never what I want to hear. Two day ago I get the code "I miss you". I get from her when she is in trouble. So, I text her back and forth, to see what I could do. I try in these feeble words of my country intellect to shoe her that not only did she need my help but I needed her worst. I am stuck in a bad living situation only getting feed when I can get out and do it myself. Others fix food in my house but don't invite me to eat. I have problems walking and standing. My bed clothes only get wash if I start trying to take them off my bed and the other see me trying to do it, if they don't I have tom try and wash and dry them myself. When I can fix me food, I clean the pot and skillet I use and bring them to my room, because it hurt me to stand and wash them twice, because if I leave them in the kitchen the others use them but never clean them. My wife" who from at least 20 years has not said the words "I love you" to me, and we have not been intimate for God hows how long.

I have now said the wrong words, trying to tell her of my love for her. I take medication to sleep. She would answer me, I told her I could not live without her. When she got the messages she took it to mean I was going to kill myself. I fucked up, I dont know how to say my I mean. I am treated like shit in my own home, by people that are suppose to love me. I need this girl of 31 to help me, and love me. Now she has told me never to contact her again there on her last text. When I was try to explain I was asleep. When sleep tried to call, I take Clonazepam to sleep. It keeps me out for about 3 and one half hours, that is all the sleep I get a day, but it is almost possible to wake me.
I woke to a cell phone call, I was still druggy. I was the police, she had call them and told them she thought I had comment suicide. Because when she call I was asleep and didnt hear her call or I would have answer it. I told her in the text that I needed her now, like I had helped her over the years, even though she said it was unrealistic. My family has screw up every attempt I have made to get someone to help me. To be a companion and friend. Now I have lost the only one that I truly care for and have for some long, because some asshole in a chat room ask me if I had a gun and I turn on my video and with the gun turned sideways show him. I never pointed the gun at myself and never said the words I was going to shot myself or comment suicide. But this is what she was told. So, my day did not go well, with police, EMT, CIA, and doctors. I had to call the VA and get my social worker to vouch for me not being suicidal. I need someone to get to her and explain to her, that she is all I have, and now I am all alone. I am not going to hurt myself, but I will live the rest of my life in misery and despair without her. And ask her to forgive me, for all I have put her through because of not knowing what to said and how to say it. Please someone help me. I am so sad and lonely. Cant the guy ever get the girl anymore at the end of the movie? Please. Please .Please. I need my adopted daughter to love me and help me, like I have helped her.

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