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On Friday, in the first time in a long time, I spent a long night out. Darren was in town for Brew Fest, and many familiar pastimes were enjoyed. There was good food courtesy of Miss Anita at Pound Cakes and More. There were nekkid dancers courtesy of Sassy's. There was booze, there were donuts, and there were friends. It was a great way to...
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jujubee:
I like the hair!!!!
skizzyk:
You look nice! love
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I used to suffer panic attacks fairly often. More often when I was on prednisone, when all it would take is was something small like misplacing my car keys, or not having any coffee in the house, or the thought of going outside. Even for a while after coming off the steroids I would still get panic attacks from mildly bothersome things like losing my...
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skizzyk:
Panic attacks really do suck! I've had them terribly for some time and xanax was always the answer. Now that I don't have that...I don't really have them anymore. Thank God. I would really feel like I was dying. I would tell everyboyd take me to Baylor Hospital if I go unconsious. My mom is on prednisone and has real bad ones. She also has emphysema so when she can't breathe she REALLY can't breathe. The only person who can calm her down is her best friend who looks her straight in the eye and just tells her she CAN breathe. Sandi is the ONLY one who can calm her down. She really thinks she's dying. She goes through the whole bit about losing all bodily functions and everything. She thinks if she pees on herself that she really is dying so that makes it worse and so on and so on. It's BAD! The worse ones last 45mins to an hour. Now that's a long time to have a panic attack. I never thought that prednisone could be the cause of the panic attacks though. She's had them even before she was on prednisone though. She's had them since she had emphysema.

Anyway...That's my experience with them. They SUCK! I'm sorry you are experiencing them. Hang in there!
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Every person, no matter well you think you know them, has a dozen hidden facets. A dozen hidden identities that you may have never suspected, but can be clearly seen when the wind changes direction. All people are born with the capability for as many behaviors and emotions as their intellect will allow, and those can range wildly.

The friend you know today may not...
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riz:
I don't like to think of them as "hidden identities" so much as I like to think of myself as interesting multi-dimensional person. Not every dimension of me shows at any one given moment, but just cause I can't show it all at once, doesn't mean I'm not ALL those things all the time.

Example: I am a very sexual person... though to what extent most people never find out, because I can only be fully sexually open within a relationship. It takes time for me to build trust before I can allow my sexuality to show fully to someone.

Does that mean that when I'm single and not fucking that I'm not sexual? No, not at all. That part of me is still with me, it's just not in a position to show.

I know what you mean though. Cause I see it in myself as well as others. I think that's what makes people so interesting is that no matter how long you know someone that you can always count on them to surprise you and show you something new. Though I'm also someone who loves to help push people to a new level. Challenge them to show a truer form of them self.

One of my favorite quotes reflects this:

"Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is. The most important product of his effort is his own personality." - Erich Fromm

ok.... end rant/long winded talk
skizzyk:
OMG! You have the same birthday as my brother! How funny is that! I just realized that. May tenth! He's only gonna be 26 though. Ya'll have another thing in common. Wow!
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I'm sitting here listening to AC/DC's Back in Black and nodding along thinking, "Yeah. That sounds about right."

I feel pretty good. I've been out like 4 nights in a row now, and apart from the problem of spending more money than I should it's been a lot of fun. I'm not out clubbing or anything, but getting out of the house and walking around...
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_tab:
That is good news smile
riz:
How have you been? I worry about you and your health.
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There are some art projects that I've still never seen duplicated. EBN is one of them:



One more diversion in the theater of entertainment we all now live in.
snarky:
How are you?
snarky:
I am so very glad that your surgery went well and that you are doing good :]

Take care and keep in touch, dear.
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I haven't updated this in a while, and that's a shame because a lot has happened since I last did. Well, a lot to me anyway. I quit Everquest 2. Well, ok, I quit the guild I was in. I still occasionally log in and play for a few hours in the wee hours of the morning, but I'm no longer raiding. I no longer...
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Well the surgery was a partial success. My arm is much improved, but it's still a little swollen. The surgeon came by after I gave the nurse the ultimatum, "Look, there's no reason for me to be here. Either the guy comes by and signs my discharge papers, or I walk out of here on my own. Either way, I'm leaving." Suddenly he had the...
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prockgirlscout:
I'm happy it's at least a modicum of "better."

I'm bummed to hear that your surgeon isn't the fucking stellar rockstar, fix anything surgeon you deserve.

I'm envious and proud of your ability to be your own advocate and stand up for exactly what you feel is right in the realm of your own health care (and come to think of it- other areas of your life too wink )

I've only had surgery twice in my life and both times I felt like "a ripped up meat puppet" and they were nothing like what you've been through. I honestly can't imagine. I hope the meds help and that coming off them isn't hellish. I get wrecked if I have to come off a week long course of entry level vicodin. I can drink like a fish but opiates twist me up in a really evil way.

I'll be thinking about you. kiss
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Check in for surgery is 15 hours to fix The Arm Problem. Maybe I'll be home and in bed within 24. I have 3 more hours before I'm supposed to stop eating, but years of this nonsense has taught me that I have more like 6 - 8 hours to eat without being in any danger of a complication with the anesthetic. I'll be good...
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schmelectra:
good luck, man.

After all these years, i'd like nothing more than to see a success story. i'll be thinking about you tomorrow afternoon.

kiss
snarky:
Surgery!?

Arm problem!?

WHATTTTTT!!!?!?!?!?


Awwwww, I hope everything goes smoothly for you, dear.

Take care, get plenty of rest and feel better soon.

I will be thinking about you!

xx
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I got into the habit a few years ago of writing eulogies for people. It started shortly after Natasha left. I found it real hard to be upset about people when I thought about having to speak at their funeral. As much as I might hate someone in life, once dead I have no choice but to remember them for the good as well as...
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prockgirlscout:
Rob was giving me a hard time about something yesterday and I told him to save it for my eulogy. tongue
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I may start playing WoW. I download the 10 day demo. Several of my EQ2 buddies are buying the full version in the next couple of days. I will have 5 friend on the Malorne PvP server. I was thinking of making a toon on the same server as the SG guild, but I've been playing MMOs with these guys for 2 years now. I'll...
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d_day:
Warcrack? Warcrack? I thought I raised you better than that!

But seriously, this Warhammer thing sounds interesting. I must learn more.
d_day:
I've never thought having to pay a monthly for the right to play a game was a good idea. Obivously, if I'm talking about warhammer, I'm softening on that a bit. I still don't like the idea, but by the time it's released, I might be more amicable to it. I've spent so much time badmouthing Warcrack though, that i'll never play that one.