pwndcake

To begin with, let me say if someone offers you the opportunity to have electrified needles jabbed into your throat, you should say no. I mean it. It's a lot less fun than it sounds, and I mean that literally.

"But Orion," you might say, "that doesn't sound fun at all."
To which I would say, "Well, yeah, that's my point. Geezus, did you go to school to be that dense?"
and then you'd probably kick me. I know I would. I'm such an ass.

Anyway, the point of this is to let you know that I did in fact have needles stabbed into my throat, and they were conducting electricity. Not for fun, though, but for a serious medical and scientific evaluation. Or so I'm told. I think I caught the nurse laughing a couple of times, but I was too busy shutting my eyes from the pain and having panic attacks to really be sure what I saw. I'm quite sure of what I heard from the doctor though.

"Well what we're testing is if underneath all that scar tissue your vocal chords are still able to move, or if they've come completely paralyzed. Hear that staticy sound? That's what it sounds like when we find live tissue."

And the results?

My vocal chords still work. Held fast under layers of scar tissue they have been unable to move, but they're alive under there. It's possible to free them up by surgically removing the scar tissue, and that's just what the surgeon and I are going to talk about at my next visit.

The trach is one step closer to gone.