punksauce

I'm freaking out right now. I just tried to call Becky and Suzie but they wont answer...I'm so alone. I am always alone.

As you know the end of the contest is very near...The 14th is our meeting day to find out (as a group) who wins the grand prize. I have been talking about this day for 11 weeks.... 11 WEEKS!!!!! My parents PROMISED to be there...they promised that THIS time they actually will support me by showing up and keeping me together if i dont win. heh YEAH FUCKING RIGHT! why do I even tell people that I have parents? When have they ever been there for me? Fiscally...never, not once..if I needed something "go get it yourself," emotionally, HA! "suck it up, you dont know the meaning of hurt," verbally??? omg..every single time I have come to them for help they would throw me off on someone else or completely ignore me. I am such an idiot for thinking that they have changed since I moved out. They honestly could care less what I do, where I do it, and who I do it to. Like I said, they promised they would be there for support...now they made plans to go to the shore....heh...they didn't even invite me to my OWN SISTER'S birthday party...not that they didn't invite me...they didn't tell me when it was until it was over. If everything else that was going on wasn't enough...I can't cry any more yet the tears wont stop. I can't take this shit right now. I don't want to show up alone. What will I do if I dont win?? Who will I lean on?? I think im having a break down.



i got a notice today, they verizon is shutting down my phone until i can come up with money to pay the bill. its three months over due....my credit card is over due by two months...my car isnt worth shit...i dont know what to do...