punkinfanta

errr. i'm suppose to be really happy right now...and i am...but i'm also scared and nervous. and there is a hint of underlying doubt.

yesterday was my last day @ my current job location. i had not even 24hrs notice. the store i have always wanted to be manager of, is in need. i start tomorrow as ACTING STORE MANAGER and this week i interview...
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i can't fucking think straight.
this is me:


*swoon*

and to top it off, i have the loveliest flowers to look at

i'd say besides love and cuddles (which i do not get nearly enough of) my favorite thing in the whole wide world is discovering new bands and new music that i adore.

i discovered gatsby's american dream last week while browsing the playlist at work and yeah, i'm basically in love.

if brandon boyd from incubus doesn't accept my marriage proposal, i'm going to marry...
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i have to dedicate this. because it's august 6th. i slightly altered it to fit. but for some reason this is the song that has been running in my head concerning this and you.

"These are your good years
Don't take my advice
You never wanted the nice girls anyway
And I'm of good cheer
'Cause I've been checking my list
The gifts you're receiving...
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it's friday night and i'm going out.
and sunday i have a date.
what is this pleasurable nonesense?!?!
i think pictures are an order.



ps- anyone who had any inkling of what was going on with me, i got my results back. i got grade A top choice blood

haha

booyah


btw- i haven't written a deep long blog for a reason....a superb one is...
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i'm thinking i need some testimonials

ugh i'm so sick.

physically.

and of all of this.

i wish there was a puking smiley, oh there is!

i just came to the conclusion that it's all about the risks.

so i took one.

"if i fail well then i fail, but at least i gave you something"

this blog was supposed to be about the deftones. it came to me at work. cherry waves was playing. their music is so sexy. everything slows down a bit. sensual. i fantasized about riding shotgun, driving down some road. possibly next to the beach. night. windows down. warm air rushing in. too many stars in the sky. flowing hair. the music loud. looking over at...
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excerpt from today's writings. notes for the "book" whatever you want to call it. i call it this ridiculously long piece that i have been writing for a year and 1/2 aka too long. aka i thought i would have been done a long time ago. aka i want to be done by august 6th to spite you but i doubt it will happen for...
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i'm afraid it's all past tense.

mr. sandman


i had a really horrible dream. and i only remember bits & pieces..

i was at this house with a lot of people. we were sitting in a room watching tv i believe. supposedly C came in sometime and was in the next room but i didn't pay any attention till i sat up and peeked over and was disgusted. he knew i...
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