well, the official facial piercing count has gone up to five now. i got the other side of my nose done, i am now symmetrical. sweet ass. i had dinner with aaron and isaac this evening at oriental cuisine. hung out with my mom a lot today. got groceries and paid bills, i am so responsible. i don't know what to write. that is just...
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this was sunday:so today was day one in the three part series that is my days off. i go to see my therapist tomorrow. she's new, hopefully it will work out. the appointment is ass early in the morning though, like nine thirty, that's the earliest i've had to get up in like forever. i don't know why but i keep waking up at six...
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i've stared at this blank page for about five minutes and all i can think to say is that i wish everything was completely fine. but somewhere underneath the surface, deep beneath the sugary coating, something is amiss. and i can't place it exactly, but it isn't right. huh, i just keep shaking my head at myself. not knowing what to think or even say...
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watched the boondock saints this evening with ethan and aaron, it kicked ass. i have been hearing that the movie was great for forever and had never seen it. work was wonderfully boring. i made money, but i would have rather have been at home on the couch. i am not meant to be a waitress. i'm just not. i really do hate my job...
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well it appears i am deathly allergic to something. i have these wonderful welts and they itch like hell. it's disgusting really. i got contacts today, so now i look less militant. i have felt sick as hell all damn day, nothing seems to help. i can't sleep worth shit either. it's lovely. i don't know what's wrong with me. i should be happy. joe...
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that was fun, i enrolled in tri-care this morning. let me paint the picture for you. i am beautifully hung-over, disheveled hair, greasy face, chapped lips, slept in clothes, the whole bit. on top of that ethan's cats slept on my hoodie. and i am missing a chunk of my eyebrow, it got smudged off in my sleep. i was such a rock star this...
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i've been laughing so hard my face hurts. tonight is one of the best nights i've had since joe left. i see my shrink tomorrow, oh the joy that will be. tonight i have none of myself to give because i am going to be a selfish little brat and milk this feeling as long as it lasts. it's nice when people don't judge you...
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shake for me. i want to be so much better than ok. ok is sub-par. ok is not good enough. as it stands i am ok. that doesn't mean i'm good or great or even fine, i'm just ok. ok, basically means you have no reason to throw yourself off the nearest cliff. i would love to be better than not wanting to plunge to...
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deadman69:
is everything ok... 
nice new profile pic 
if you wanna talk im on aim...hit me up...
nice new profile pic if you wanna talk im on aim...hit me up...
jackinblack:
happiness ????????
is this when you finally find yourself and your role in life
to get there requires questioning yourself and facing up to your answers and suffering through situations and seeing how you cope and than knowing what you feel
its a long and cathargic experience
some people never bother or cant deal with it
to ever find out
the older you get the more intense this gets until you either crack it open or just suppress it all
but really
noone knows what they really want at 21 not to sound condescending i mean i sure as fuck didnt
i know more now
but everything also keeps changing and so i have to keep questioning
trying to take myself deeper into the heart of darkness
and i have a happiness in knowing myself enough to believe in who iam
life is a crazy rollercoaster drowning under murky water one minute and rocketting up amongst amazing hedonistic clouds the next
but what else is there
its life
and there aint much of another substitute
is this when you finally find yourself and your role in life
to get there requires questioning yourself and facing up to your answers and suffering through situations and seeing how you cope and than knowing what you feel
its a long and cathargic experience
some people never bother or cant deal with it
to ever find out
the older you get the more intense this gets until you either crack it open or just suppress it all
but really
noone knows what they really want at 21 not to sound condescending i mean i sure as fuck didnt
i know more now
but everything also keeps changing and so i have to keep questioning
trying to take myself deeper into the heart of darkness
and i have a happiness in knowing myself enough to believe in who iam
life is a crazy rollercoaster drowning under murky water one minute and rocketting up amongst amazing hedonistic clouds the next
but what else is there
its life
and there aint much of another substitute
so i just got off work, went to the bar next door. downed three shots of southern comfort and came home. my belly burns, it's great. i invited andy to come with me, but he drank the night before and probably would have gotten in trouble with his wife for drinking two nights in a row. he is a fairly belligerent drunk, so he has...
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jackinblack:
its nice to read you
i love drinking too much too
and i worry about becoming an alcoholic as well
but noone has said anything so until that date i assume im not
maybe i just wanna be shocked
i love drinking too much too
and i worry about becoming an alcoholic as well
but noone has said anything so until that date i assume im not
maybe i just wanna be shocked
so tony is working on drawing up my leg piece, and should be giving me a call about it early next week. which will be excellent. i am looking forward to this piece, it is a tribute to my family. i'm sure it will be beautiful. i got my base i.d. and stickers for my car. on monday i go to fill out all the...
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braddropout:
Shit, got so caught up in my birthday, didn't realise yours was less than a week later. Happy birthday! Hope you had a good one. Sorry. I'm a bad friend. You can have some if my viagra if you want 
deadman69:
Mt Dew is the 
of my life
of my life