pudding

and there must be something going on because i can't sleep and with as far away as you are i'm pretty damn sure you aren't sleeping either. the craziness has gone so far that it is two thiry in the fucking morning and i'm running the dishwasher probably pissing off my neighbors. i still chuckle to myself when i think about the vacant apartment below...
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i am sensing very little love for me these days. even my own family doesn't want to hang out with me, case in point is my brother who ditched out on me for some girl he's chasing after. and while she is a nice and all around wonderful girl and i'm sure she makes him very happy there is no excuse for ditching out on...
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so yeah, i got a call at 9:30 this morning, which woke me up, from someone on base confirming the date the movers are coming to move our shit. it's the fourth by the way, just in case anyone out there in internet land gives a shit. i got another call a little while later form the moving company itself asking what they should be...
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we are moving to the LA/ Long Beach area!

so i stood up for myself today, and it felt good, go figure.

i'm not dead, just haven't felt like posting in the last couple days. pieces.

so today was just one of those days. it wasn't busy or slow at work it just was work. and i learned that i should be expecting an increase in hours over the next few weeks because one of the girls has a teaching gig for the next five weeks. i wish i knew more about when and where we are moving to. i haven't...
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well, the official facial piercing count has gone up to five now. i got the other side of my nose done, i am now symmetrical. sweet ass. i had dinner with aaron and isaac this evening at oriental cuisine. hung out with my mom a lot today. got groceries and paid bills, i am so responsible. i don't know what to write. that is just...
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this was sunday:so today was day one in the three part series that is my days off. i go to see my therapist tomorrow. she's new, hopefully it will work out. the appointment is ass early in the morning though, like nine thirty, that's the earliest i've had to get up in like forever. i don't know why but i keep waking up at six...
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i've stared at this blank page for about five minutes and all i can think to say is that i wish everything was completely fine. but somewhere underneath the surface, deep beneath the sugary coating, something is amiss. and i can't place it exactly, but it isn't right. huh, i just keep shaking my head at myself. not knowing what to think or even say...
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watched the boondock saints this evening with ethan and aaron, it kicked ass. i have been hearing that the movie was great for forever and had never seen it. work was wonderfully boring. i made money, but i would have rather have been at home on the couch. i am not meant to be a waitress. i'm just not. i really do hate my job...
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well it appears i am deathly allergic to something. i have these wonderful welts and they itch like hell. it's disgusting really. i got contacts today, so now i look less militant. i have felt sick as hell all damn day, nothing seems to help. i can't sleep worth shit either. it's lovely. i don't know what's wrong with me. i should be happy. joe...
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