pubert

I have no other option but to move. The people who really care about me are within driving distance of me unlike before. Back in battle creek i got some choices to make. People to avoid. Apparantly words on the street i'm on the way back and some people are looking for me. Some want to kill me, some want some busiess opportunitys i can lend them. Mom and dad most all want me in a destructive enviroment.

And admist all this i'm supposed to give up and walk away from the one girl who made it all make sense.This girl whose absense has inspired some of the best writing i've come up with in a while. Not mention this gaping hole i feel in my respitory system. Memories are all i have left of her. I was gonna spring and do something stupid and visit her one last time. Than it occured to me if she wanted to see you before you went she'd contact you. I still want to be the one to save her, but right now i can't really save myself. I feel so lost right now. Everything positive in my life i did a good job of ruining.

Still though, at least i had the privlidge to be a positive part of her life, however short lived. I miss that little girl. I was hoping that even if me and her mom didn't work out i'd always have her love, but i can't even go near her.

And maybe if i cut out my tear ducts i can stop wasting time crying and move on. What other choice do i have? Than again she might also be packing my seed one never does know