GOD DAMNIT GOD DAMNIT GOD DAMNIT
I have been in love (a term a never throw around when describing crushes) sense january and its eating me alieve. I'm all about the hetro friendships. Boys and girls can and will always be friends. However (and we're all aware of this) about 100% if not more of them revolve around one party having feelings they can't bring themsevles to confess to the other party.
Last week i fucked up. I confessed my latent feelings in a slopy display of my bi-poloar tendancies. In a manic "i hate everyone cause everyone hates me" phase i slipped up and lost my tounge in front of the other party. She smiled shruged and stood by me as a friend. That means a lot .
But to think. Heres this girl who fits that out line of what I want. And sadly i never say this about myself, but i'd say theres some mutual attraction. however with her bf and having plans to move in together this april i'm batting in the big leagues again biting off more than i could chew. Man girls with boyfriends we're more tanagable ideas in high school......but alas....
How i can sit idoly by...feeling that nervous tick in my stomach go as i flip through her cd's. How we share a conversation on the couch when i keep forgeting what i'm talking about cause all i wanna do is kiss her. how many other girls can you convince to build a fort out of couch cushions and blankets with little to no strugle?? I'm convinced the answer my friend is blowing in the wind....or its 49 either or!
Reguardless this makes me sick. I feel weightless when i'm even with in proximaty to her. I'm falling when i move closer. And when we part ways reality sets in and i realize as she walks an oppisite directino she won't be looking over her solider to see i'm smiling over mine to look at her as she strolls away. FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
I haven't even dated you once. I don't even want a gf right now. But your the one person who makes me want to do the most retarded shit imaginable. I would take up gardening for you....GARDENING!?!?!?! You make that empty feeling change. And i can't stop thinking about you. Well...you and your boyfriend that is. Man i hate college!
"All i wanna do is ride bikes with you
stay up late and watch cartoons..."
-the Moldy Peaches
I have been in love (a term a never throw around when describing crushes) sense january and its eating me alieve. I'm all about the hetro friendships. Boys and girls can and will always be friends. However (and we're all aware of this) about 100% if not more of them revolve around one party having feelings they can't bring themsevles to confess to the other party.
Last week i fucked up. I confessed my latent feelings in a slopy display of my bi-poloar tendancies. In a manic "i hate everyone cause everyone hates me" phase i slipped up and lost my tounge in front of the other party. She smiled shruged and stood by me as a friend. That means a lot .
But to think. Heres this girl who fits that out line of what I want. And sadly i never say this about myself, but i'd say theres some mutual attraction. however with her bf and having plans to move in together this april i'm batting in the big leagues again biting off more than i could chew. Man girls with boyfriends we're more tanagable ideas in high school......but alas....
How i can sit idoly by...feeling that nervous tick in my stomach go as i flip through her cd's. How we share a conversation on the couch when i keep forgeting what i'm talking about cause all i wanna do is kiss her. how many other girls can you convince to build a fort out of couch cushions and blankets with little to no strugle?? I'm convinced the answer my friend is blowing in the wind....or its 49 either or!
Reguardless this makes me sick. I feel weightless when i'm even with in proximaty to her. I'm falling when i move closer. And when we part ways reality sets in and i realize as she walks an oppisite directino she won't be looking over her solider to see i'm smiling over mine to look at her as she strolls away. FUCK
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK
I haven't even dated you once. I don't even want a gf right now. But your the one person who makes me want to do the most retarded shit imaginable. I would take up gardening for you....GARDENING!?!?!?! You make that empty feeling change. And i can't stop thinking about you. Well...you and your boyfriend that is. Man i hate college!
"All i wanna do is ride bikes with you
stay up late and watch cartoons..."
-the Moldy Peaches