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pubert

Milwaukee

Member Since 2005

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Wednesday Oct 26, 2005

Oct 26, 2005
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So i've been giving a lot of thought to a lot of things. A lot of them are mostly the retorical questions someone asks only of themselves in time of great confussion. For instance, where am I going? What purpose am I serving? Will this pass? Why do I feel so imcomplete? Why does it seem when you want something you can't have, you want it more? To make matters even stranger, i've been having bizare ominisant dreams. I was at a party friday and this girl asked me what my b-day was. I answered and she thought for a moment and smiled and says "ahh a pieces, and leap year to boot...don't worry about the bad dreams you've been having lately what ever it is your facing you'll come out on top." At this time to my knowledge i wasn't dreaming, or at least anything worth remembering. So i brushed her off as wierd and went and stood around with a couple of dudes by the fire. Monday morning i awake from bizare, nerve racking dream around 5am. The dream i'm not sure how it translates, but to sum it up, very very much like "last house on the left, or American Gothic." Meaning it was violent, disturbing. So disturbing that even after 2 joints a bowl of cereal and the history chanel could not bring me back to my normally pleastant state of solitary slumber (wait thats not pleasent thats just heart wrenching).

This mourning i had a dream about reciving a phone call for someone asking for a Merry (spelling?) and arguing that the bitch don't live here never has never will. In the midst of arguing with this woman on the phone she says well look, does this phone number sound familar to you? And reads my moms cell phone back to me. And says its registered to my address. I'm like well thats my mom but her name is Toni, and i try to write down a number for my ma to call her at, only i'm struck with dyslexia and can't bring pen to paper to correctly, and take the wrong number. I wake up to the sound of my cell phone ringing. Its my lawyer. Wierd!

So admist all this i've got this dumb ass plan bottling up at the back of my brain. All i'll say is this, i'm willing to grow up for this girl. Thats something i've been fighting tooth and nail sense the stagering slow beggings of pubic hair. Hehh i'd embrace adult hood. I'd leave the seat down (which i've doing a really good job of for some reason). And I may have found a way to follow through on one of those promises that i never got a chance to keep....now if i can only get my ass out of the frying pan and into the preverbial fire.

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