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i don't understand strip clubs. it's been a really long time since i got any, and my friends at work have been trying to convince me to go with them to a strip club in dc. i adamantly refuse every time. they say, "don't you want a lap dance? don't you want beautiful girls getting naked right in your face?" when i say "NO!" they always reply, "well, okay, we can go to a gay strip club if you want..." i just don't see the point. pretend you are lost out in the desert, haven't eaten for days, and you are starving. instead of actually eating a meal, would you like someone to take a big, juicy steak and rub it all over your face? how bout if they smear the mashed potatoes on your chest? a large rack of barbecued ribs stuffed down your pants, but you can't eat any of it. this is how i see strip clubs. to me, it's completely obvious why i wouldn't want to indulge in that type of activity, but to my friends, it's totally incomprehensible. which side do you people out there fall on?