My mind goes to weird places when Im tired so im sitting here after a 16hr day, having a drink and sorting through my maelstrom of mental processes. I like the smell of old spice for one reason, it reminds me of my dad when I was a kid. Its a fond memory. So I used to buy a bottle and wear it when I felt a little down. Then a very good friend of mine shared some pearls of wisdom. She said it reminds EVERYONE of their father, and did I really want a girl thinking about her dad when Im flirting with her?
I couldn't argue that point, so hence that was the last time I bought old spice. Then today I was reminiscing and it occurred to me, guys also coined the phrase "who's you daddy'? during sex. Well that one comes from watching too much porn, no secret there, because logically why would any girl want to think about her father in a time like that?
Another porn adaptation that has no place in the reality sex arena, smacking your dick off a womans face. I have never met a woman who has either asked for that, nor admitting to even enjoying it. At best you will meet with aggravated tolerance to this maneuver. Most likely you will meet with a punch to the sack. Still if you are learning your moves from your latest xxx hit and don't know the difference between sex and sex for the camera, you may believe the ooo's and oh babies that are coming from her mouth.
Moron.
And all this stems from a conversation I had with a female coworker yesterday who said, oh well i guess humans haven't mastered telekinesis yet. My first instinctual response was, if guys could move shit with their minds, they would use that skill to jerk off without using their hands. Not only that, but we would regard this achievement of the pinnacle of skill in regards to this new ability.
A man is never more resourceful or more creative, than he is when there is sexual gratification involved. He is also at his dumbest.
Some days I am amazed we made it past the whole flinging poop stage of our human development.
I couldn't argue that point, so hence that was the last time I bought old spice. Then today I was reminiscing and it occurred to me, guys also coined the phrase "who's you daddy'? during sex. Well that one comes from watching too much porn, no secret there, because logically why would any girl want to think about her father in a time like that?
Another porn adaptation that has no place in the reality sex arena, smacking your dick off a womans face. I have never met a woman who has either asked for that, nor admitting to even enjoying it. At best you will meet with aggravated tolerance to this maneuver. Most likely you will meet with a punch to the sack. Still if you are learning your moves from your latest xxx hit and don't know the difference between sex and sex for the camera, you may believe the ooo's and oh babies that are coming from her mouth.
Moron.
And all this stems from a conversation I had with a female coworker yesterday who said, oh well i guess humans haven't mastered telekinesis yet. My first instinctual response was, if guys could move shit with their minds, they would use that skill to jerk off without using their hands. Not only that, but we would regard this achievement of the pinnacle of skill in regards to this new ability.
A man is never more resourceful or more creative, than he is when there is sexual gratification involved. He is also at his dumbest.
Some days I am amazed we made it past the whole flinging poop stage of our human development.
lolablu:
My friend will actually be at the party too. Really, a lot of my friends will. What you said reminded me that those friends can be the real reason I'm going,
zombiekittybot:
no snow yet