prophetnoise

Joke of the day:

Local Insane Asylum.
Time for their Yearly review by the state.
State Inspector shows up and talks to the Asylums administrator. They chat for a while, go over some numbers and then the inpector say, "Everything seems in order, i just need to go around and do a visual inspection of some of the patients."
"Follow me," says the administrator.

They get to the first room and the inspector opens the door. He finds a lady sitting on the floor next to a bucket. She reaches up, picks nothing out of the air, and places it in the bucket; over and over.
"What are you doing?" he asks.
"Oh, i'm picking the stars out the sky and putting them in this bucket. When i get all the stars out of the sky they're going to let me out of here.!" She replies.

The administrator takes some notes and they go on to the next room. In this room he finds a lady sitting on the floor next to a bucket. She reaches in the bucket and grabs nothing, reaches up and puts nothing up into the air; over and over.

"What are you doing?" he asks the second lady.
"Oh, i'm taking all the stars out of this bucket and putting them up in the sky. When all the stars are back up in the sky they're going to let me out of here!" She replies.

The administrator takes some more notes and they go on to the next room. In this room is a naked lady with a bucket of cashews, and she taking handfulls of cashews out of the bucket and shoving them up her vagina.

"What are you doing?" he asks the third lady
"I'M FUCKING NUTS AND THEY'RE NEVER GONNA LET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!!"

ba dum CHING!