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prophecusp

Galactic Center

Member Since 2003

Followers 64 Following 87

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Thursday May 04, 2006

May 4, 2006
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hmmm...i'm so confused, yet highly motivated on the inside, yet highly lazy and unmotivated on the outside.

this would be the effects of taurus (lazy) and mercury (ideas) in aries (action). spring is unfolding finally as new ideas will begin to blossom over the next few weeks.

i'm kind of uncertain where things are headed. i'm in SF now and i don't plan on leaving california any time soon, but i don't know where to settle. i have the perfect setup right now. i'm living in a sweet neighborhood (inner richmond) and am only bound to a 6 month lease, but after that if things haven't materialized here, i'm thinking i might have to try Los Angeles before this whole experiment is over with. that poses all kinds of new problems, but it also matches the fever pitch of if i struggle and survive there, i might just end up leading the life i want instead of the one i'm living.

i have this acute need right now to represent and get myself heard. it's as if i spent my teens and twenties so far waiting to take some kind of action. i have accrued so much intellectual understanding of my universe, but am only just beginning to see the effects of right thinking leading to right action. i decided to move to california on a whim last november. it was the right move and i made it in an instant. i left a solid, yet wholly unfulfilling life in massachusetts before that. and now i'm here after selling my possesions and leaving my whole life behind. it was the only option.

i know i'm destined for something fascinating on this journey and i rather enjoy being a gypsy. where is the next turn on this road? i ask the tarot and it spits out the same 3 cards every time...always leaving the future card in some kind of libra related unknown balance...

i'm always thrilled to be alive...but when does this life get truly interesting, now that i've realized all is illusion and you receive the energy you send....right now i'm dreaming of myself as a success in a creative field somewhere in sunny california...

i need to focus. ideas and abstraction were the knowledge until this moment, but now i need some fire. it's to burn the houses down

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