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projectnova

Evansville, Indiana

Member Since 2002

Followers 104 Following 134

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Wednesday Jul 25, 2007

Jul 24, 2007
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Just for the Record...

I do write a hell of a lot more in regards to 'diary' entries or blog postings. Most of them live on my MacBook or iMac as stickies.

For those of you who know me very well, as in have known me since way before i moved to SF, nothing i write would surprise any of you. you all know me pretty freakin' well. For those of you who have met me since, my blog postings would probably startle you, to say the least. Let's just say, i'm a bastard (in more ways that one). and i probably think i'm cooler than you. again, those of you who i grew up with, you expect this, those of you who didnt... well... i'm a bit of a dick sometimes, i'm just a hell of a lot more restrained and polite since i moved out here.

And i'm probably one of the most honest people you'll ever meet, if you get to the point of me being totally open with you.

And i'm a hell of a lot more passionate about EVERYTHING than i let on. i get more upset, i get more angry, i am happier, i'm more optimistic: i am so much more than most of you have ever known, that is, unless of course, you knew me before i discovered restraint.

Lauren can back me up. So can my brother. James too. James tells tales of me just saying fuck it, walking up to the biggest ape in the room, telling him he's a douchebag and then leaving with his girlfriend... all the while, the gorilla is scratching his head wondering what the fuck just happened. Now, i dont remember anything happening just like that... but i can remeber having just as cock sure little exploits when i was in highschool and afterward.

and hey, to all of you girls who i've told that i've been in love with: i was being honest. and i have the tendecy to fall for someone more frequently than i'd like to admit. i can think of three girls off of the top of my head who i would have given just about anything to 'make it work'. so now i'm jaded. now, all i want to do it take all of those wonderful, giving emotions, turn them inside out, and becoming terribly cold and calculated about everything in my life... but then again, when havent i been?

to everyone who ever broke my heart, fuck you. your days are numbered, and i never forget. the day will come when i'm standing high on the mountain of my success, and you wonder why the fuck you gave me up, and i'll tell you exactly why right now, because most of you are fucking BLIND to everything except what is right in front of your face. and life is much more than pretty words, or the next fix, i just regret that you'll have to go through such levels of pain and anguish to realize those things.

so i take my bow. here is my small sliver of evidence. evidence that under my shell, i've got a hell of a lot more going on than you can or will ever imagine... that is, unless you already know me. and only a few of you really do.

i am William Masterson.
i am William Fairaday.
i am a tyrant, and fuck you, i'm brilliant.

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