I do the SubStation rounds today.... as i'm driving the big rig down from the south sub... a spider drops from the ceiling.... a lesser man would've driven the truck into the ditch.... me? I ducked?
I freakin' ducked....??? talk about reflexes? I'm not sure that was the right response... but I didnt end up in the creek or ditch! ha!
btw the spider was released or continues to live in the truck unharmed....
So why am I wasting time with people who aren't you? why do I do things with people who aren't you? where are you?
where am I? what have i done lately? who am I?
what am i fighting for?
who am i fighting for?
what do i want?
these are the questions that i need to answer.... where do i go from here?
I feel lost... i'm missing.
every so often, i get that feeling, the void, the need, the want... the want to hold tightly, the need to listen to....
that's the funny thing ... i rarely feel alone, but i often feel lost...... sehnsucht
what makes anyone even remotely interested in me..... i'm not in so much of a self loathing mood..... just curious.
because I do refuse to give into the fact/theory.... that the sum of who i am is/are nothing but the culmination of a series of chemical reactions, in careful sequence repeating, repeating and determining who and what I am.
I am?
I am RNA/DNA/ covalent and ionic bonds? synapsis, neurons....?
i am me?
I'm afraid of?
I'm not afraid of?
I'm programmed?
I hate, I love?
Do I? is it chemical? yes!
is it more? I hope so....
that's who she is... she's the one who lets me know I'm more than this. ... more than the culmination of 4billion years of evolution.... gestalt!
its evolution's finest hour.
its hard to stay strong on the inside
I'm 1 win-1 loss today- although conventional wisdom would declare two wins today....
I freakin' ducked....??? talk about reflexes? I'm not sure that was the right response... but I didnt end up in the creek or ditch! ha!
btw the spider was released or continues to live in the truck unharmed....
So why am I wasting time with people who aren't you? why do I do things with people who aren't you? where are you?
where am I? what have i done lately? who am I?
what am i fighting for?
who am i fighting for?
what do i want?
these are the questions that i need to answer.... where do i go from here?
I feel lost... i'm missing.
every so often, i get that feeling, the void, the need, the want... the want to hold tightly, the need to listen to....
that's the funny thing ... i rarely feel alone, but i often feel lost...... sehnsucht
what makes anyone even remotely interested in me..... i'm not in so much of a self loathing mood..... just curious.
because I do refuse to give into the fact/theory.... that the sum of who i am is/are nothing but the culmination of a series of chemical reactions, in careful sequence repeating, repeating and determining who and what I am.
I am?
I am RNA/DNA/ covalent and ionic bonds? synapsis, neurons....?
i am me?
I'm afraid of?
I'm not afraid of?
I'm programmed?
I hate, I love?
Do I? is it chemical? yes!
is it more? I hope so....
that's who she is... she's the one who lets me know I'm more than this. ... more than the culmination of 4billion years of evolution.... gestalt!
its evolution's finest hour.
its hard to stay strong on the inside
I'm 1 win-1 loss today- although conventional wisdom would declare two wins today....
You are beautiful beyond words.