I think maybe depression has set in. My hands feel so heavy typing at the keys. Everything is a pale washed out version of it's former self. Like the way Coke tastes funny when you are sick. The world looks funny now my life has changed. Death has taken an important person away from me and now I'm floundering. I don't even know myself anymore. Why is it that people have to wear their death's like a badge, Oh, it was 3 years since da da da died or it's been 4 years since Grandma's death. I feel it's like passing thru a wall and you come out the other side trying to feel if you are intact but you are forever changed. Nothing, no one or anything will ever be the same, especially the feeling of happiness or joy. The eternal question flys around in your head endlessly - is there anything else after this life and what's the whole point of it anyway?
anarchist:
I think the whole point is just to be here, to appreciate it, and to be able to give something back - even if it's small in comparison.