I'm going to preface this entry by saying that I'm borderline tipsy right now, which means that I mean everything I'm saying but that I'm loose enough to actually open up.
I'm pretty much sick of everyone here at the moment. I'm sick of people who think they're my friend, but only call on it when it suits them. For example, a 'friend' I'll call Mr. A, he's a guy who I'll always listen to when he's having a hard time. Tonight, I got back and said hello to him on MSN, and he asked what time the lecture was tomorrow. I told him and got a "thanks man"-esque response. I then opened up and told him I feel really fucking depressed at the moment and got no response. I said "that's what I thought, night x" and logged off.
I've lost pretty much every mate I had made here in the first year, and I genuinely don't think I've done anything to warrant it. I haven't been a dick, I haven't angered or annoyed anyone, I haven't shut people off for the sake of hanging out with other people... I just seem to have been deserted. No-one here has any time for me any more. Even the one(s) who have got girlfriends have nights off and don't want to see me, then I find out the next day that actually half the people on my course went on a massive night out which I hear about all that day. Did I get invited? Did I fuck.
Last year, I moved into my flat with four other people who I'd previously met on Facebook and knew all about. They were all nice people, but the one lad who I really clicked with and REALLY got on with, probably more than any of my friends back home even, was a guy called Joe. Long story short, the course wasn't for him, and in December last year he jacked in the course and moved home.
This year, Joe's studying in Edge Hill uni in Ormskirk. It's about half an hour from me in Liverpool, 2.90 return on the train, and so basically he's always within reach. If he dropped out of that uni, if he left and went home, I'd probably do the same. It's simply the fact he's here and we meet up more nights than not that's keeping me here.
It's not that I'm not enjoying the course, it's just that I can't be arsed being surrounded by fickle twats whilst I'm doing it. I just want to get my degree and move back home to Wales, set up a small live sound business and while away the days.
I can't be arsed with:
fair-weather friends
people who can only ever talk about the course
people who never give a shit about me
people who never invite me out and yet have no qualms about telling me all about 'how good last night was'
drunk flatmates who keep calling me until I take them home then explain that they're only joing
girls who lead me on and lead me on because it's 'funny' to toy with me
horrible girls who see me (inebriated) in my boxers and claim I'm 'literally the ugliest man they've ever seen'
the sum of all these parts, which is me, drunk, alone, depressed, pouring my heart out to a fucking blog
I'm going to bed. x
I'm pretty much sick of everyone here at the moment. I'm sick of people who think they're my friend, but only call on it when it suits them. For example, a 'friend' I'll call Mr. A, he's a guy who I'll always listen to when he's having a hard time. Tonight, I got back and said hello to him on MSN, and he asked what time the lecture was tomorrow. I told him and got a "thanks man"-esque response. I then opened up and told him I feel really fucking depressed at the moment and got no response. I said "that's what I thought, night x" and logged off.
I've lost pretty much every mate I had made here in the first year, and I genuinely don't think I've done anything to warrant it. I haven't been a dick, I haven't angered or annoyed anyone, I haven't shut people off for the sake of hanging out with other people... I just seem to have been deserted. No-one here has any time for me any more. Even the one(s) who have got girlfriends have nights off and don't want to see me, then I find out the next day that actually half the people on my course went on a massive night out which I hear about all that day. Did I get invited? Did I fuck.
Last year, I moved into my flat with four other people who I'd previously met on Facebook and knew all about. They were all nice people, but the one lad who I really clicked with and REALLY got on with, probably more than any of my friends back home even, was a guy called Joe. Long story short, the course wasn't for him, and in December last year he jacked in the course and moved home.
This year, Joe's studying in Edge Hill uni in Ormskirk. It's about half an hour from me in Liverpool, 2.90 return on the train, and so basically he's always within reach. If he dropped out of that uni, if he left and went home, I'd probably do the same. It's simply the fact he's here and we meet up more nights than not that's keeping me here.
It's not that I'm not enjoying the course, it's just that I can't be arsed being surrounded by fickle twats whilst I'm doing it. I just want to get my degree and move back home to Wales, set up a small live sound business and while away the days.
I can't be arsed with:
fair-weather friends
people who can only ever talk about the course
people who never give a shit about me
people who never invite me out and yet have no qualms about telling me all about 'how good last night was'
drunk flatmates who keep calling me until I take them home then explain that they're only joing
girls who lead me on and lead me on because it's 'funny' to toy with me
horrible girls who see me (inebriated) in my boxers and claim I'm 'literally the ugliest man they've ever seen'
the sum of all these parts, which is me, drunk, alone, depressed, pouring my heart out to a fucking blog
I'm going to bed. x
i just want to say thanks for last night.
it cheered me up.
hope it made you happier!
x