Gabapentin. That's what I was offered today. Much though the person who offered it to me meant well, had I taken this supposed anti-depressant I would have likely had a siezure. Or so the story goes. So that just goes to show all you kiddos; don't just offer ppl random medications you're taking under the presumption it's one of the happy mind-altering ones. You could get yourself in some trouble.
So um yeah. Few things on my mind. One is that Hamas was democratically elected in Palestine yesterday. I'm not sure what to say to that other than perhaps more palestinians than you would be led to believe do in fact support civilian-targeted terrorism. Mind you, what terrorism isn't civilian targeted? I'm not even sure it can be considered terrorism if it isn't targeted towards "non-military combatants" for that matter, or something like that, but anyways I digress. That's just a bit of a downer. I had higher hopes for that region of the world than what this seemingly forebodes. That's certainly shrugworthy. Oh well.
Also, I think I found the perfect girl for me. However, for some reason I appear to be trying to find flaws in her. Maybe I'm too much of a cynic to actually be willing to allow myself to fall for someone. Maybe I'm so miserable I can't just let myself be happy. Maybe I'm hoping she has some personality defect because then, without fear of guilt, I could focus on her physical defects, something I feel reluctant to do so now. She's attractive and intelligent but she was in a coma 3 months ago for 6 days due to a horrible car accident and, much though I feel shallow and somewhat ashamed of myself for thinking it, i can't help but wonder if it's not the brightest idea to be the 1st boyfriend soemone has after a life-threatening, eye-opening experience. Maybe I'm completely wrong about this, maybe she'd be the best gf ever bc of that very incident and it's ensuing psychological aftermath or maybe it could be as complicated as I fear it might be. I'm so hesitant to find out though. However irrational and unlikely it is, my fear is that I'll get myself into another relationship where I'm unable to get comfortable with someone and take them for a test ride without first getting too close to them or rather letting them get too close to me. But I might not be overanalyzing it. I'd like to think, however conceded it may or may not seem, that I can tell when someone is becoming quickly infatuated with me and regardless of whether or not I am also taken by them aswell, I'm still reluctant to walk this path. It's not like I couldn't simply tell her I'm not interested in anything too serious but then there's a chance i could'nt eat my cake too should things get interesting.
Listen to me fret over nothing. Who else could possibly complain about the burden of deciding whether or not to get serious with "the perfect girl"? Boy, that's chutzpah alright. OK, I've transcribed enough neurotic thoughts for one sitting. I'm finito.
So um yeah. Few things on my mind. One is that Hamas was democratically elected in Palestine yesterday. I'm not sure what to say to that other than perhaps more palestinians than you would be led to believe do in fact support civilian-targeted terrorism. Mind you, what terrorism isn't civilian targeted? I'm not even sure it can be considered terrorism if it isn't targeted towards "non-military combatants" for that matter, or something like that, but anyways I digress. That's just a bit of a downer. I had higher hopes for that region of the world than what this seemingly forebodes. That's certainly shrugworthy. Oh well.
Also, I think I found the perfect girl for me. However, for some reason I appear to be trying to find flaws in her. Maybe I'm too much of a cynic to actually be willing to allow myself to fall for someone. Maybe I'm so miserable I can't just let myself be happy. Maybe I'm hoping she has some personality defect because then, without fear of guilt, I could focus on her physical defects, something I feel reluctant to do so now. She's attractive and intelligent but she was in a coma 3 months ago for 6 days due to a horrible car accident and, much though I feel shallow and somewhat ashamed of myself for thinking it, i can't help but wonder if it's not the brightest idea to be the 1st boyfriend soemone has after a life-threatening, eye-opening experience. Maybe I'm completely wrong about this, maybe she'd be the best gf ever bc of that very incident and it's ensuing psychological aftermath or maybe it could be as complicated as I fear it might be. I'm so hesitant to find out though. However irrational and unlikely it is, my fear is that I'll get myself into another relationship where I'm unable to get comfortable with someone and take them for a test ride without first getting too close to them or rather letting them get too close to me. But I might not be overanalyzing it. I'd like to think, however conceded it may or may not seem, that I can tell when someone is becoming quickly infatuated with me and regardless of whether or not I am also taken by them aswell, I'm still reluctant to walk this path. It's not like I couldn't simply tell her I'm not interested in anything too serious but then there's a chance i could'nt eat my cake too should things get interesting.
Listen to me fret over nothing. Who else could possibly complain about the burden of deciding whether or not to get serious with "the perfect girl"? Boy, that's chutzpah alright. OK, I've transcribed enough neurotic thoughts for one sitting. I'm finito.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
If you're that desperate on finding a flaw in her, it'll appear when you're an item.
But until then, just enjoy the fact that you have someone, whether she's temporary or permanent, just experience all life has to offer.
If you turn this offer down, you'll regret it.
You never know until you try!