pixietom

October has already told me no...
Literally. I have been spending the past few days crying and such. Over what I really not say. It's the same old same old. I'm labeling myself 'undateable'. Cause its true or seems to be.

Yesterday though I had some friends come over and they just made is a lot better. We were supposed to hang out before but I vanished and they missed me. Its funny how many times I realize people do miss me. Not thinking low of myself really just, with the way I am I see myself as the person who wouldn't be the first on your mind to miss.
I'm still stuck on Josh. I just can't quit him and I want to. But obviously I really don't want to...

I need to re-dye my hair.... I might do that later today. Hopefully. Its still blond and black don't worry! Just gotta correct the evil thing that is fading.
I fucked up my tattoo. Actually its fine and nothing that a touch-up wont fix but... having this one in easy reach wasn't a good idea. I know not to scratch, but i scratch it while I sleep. Which is fun to wake up to once I realize that... Yay! But oh well. Like I said, nothing a touch up wont fix. I kinda want to add more shading to it. Its so lovely. It still hasn't completely healed for me. Still looks odd on my skin but oh wells. I love it.
My mommy is coming back home in November. Which is awesome. Bad, cause she doesn't know about this tattoo. I tell her every time, not that she can really stop me since I'm of age, but she just might be mad at me for a day or two.

Lastly... I am amazing. I don't mean that to be like conceited or anything. But as of late... I have more than 2 people, trying to become me. I mean that in hair colouring and styling, tattoo designs, clothing, and even the way I speak. WTF?! Really I'm not that cool. Tokidoki... This is labeled mine, amongst my friends. I'm covered in tokidoki stuff. I always have a bag and usually a jacket of tokidoki. I have a cute vinyl in my car, my mom just got me a fedora hat from tokidoki. I am... tokidoki. The trademark design was my first tattoo. I am Tokidoki. Someone I know, requested/demanded that I design them a sleeve tattoo with tokidoki... Before this same person said that he wanted to do their hair blonde with black and blue in it. Right after I had posted a picture of my new hair change... Then I have little bits of them trying to one up me in situations I don't care about. Thats just the one person. I was trying to be all like oh man. its all about me, but my friends got the picture, before I would admit it. At least I'm black bitch. Can't technically steal that! That's just one person though... Like really. I should be a celebrity cause then it wouldn't bother me. I'd be iconic but not.

I might post another blog later today. I just feel like I've been hiding from the world as of late.
I've been getting to know people again. Its funny cause we are a much better fit than I thought we ever would have been. So I'm glad to have people that understand me already. Cause I guess I'm complex and confusing.

Love, peace, and chicken grease.
Pixie to the Tom