pixelsuicide

Last night, I wrote a letter to Gish's parents expressing some of the problems and anxiety I've felt lately due to the them. I'm probably just panicking because I know these things need to be said, but I really regret doing that. Gish is supporting me fully saying it'll be ok. I'm just so scared. Even more so that their business probably is going to go under and it didn't even dawn on me what that really means. It means I'll be the only one in the house with a job should I get one at the end of this week. My old boss is asking for me back. I can't support the family. His parents own a really large house that they built. There's a tipi in our back yard along with a medicine wheel and a sweat lodge. We also have a smoke house, a garden, a workshop, a pool, a chicken coop and 20+ chickens, a greenhouse, and four cars. We'll lose it all. All my hopes and plans for building out here next to his parents will be gone. Everything I ever wanted out of life is here. Gish and I plan to travel, but I have a feeling that we'll end up in Michigan for awhile with my mom. I'm just so fucking scared. Fuck you Bush for fucking over the economy and everybody in this fucking country. I hope you rot in hell.