Friday Sep 30, 2005

0
this is the deal, the only reason, that i am going to keep trying, living, pushing up against this life that seems so ready to eat me alive:
i am going to portland, yes portland, by myself
with no one
i will reseach a place to get my tatoo that i want so badly
if, i stress if
i get my head and life and body under control
two years ago, i used to run three miles a day
my muscle is turning to fat
ick.
i want to feel my muscles move in my legs when i walk again
i want those fucking endorphins
i want to be organized, if only on the inside.
i want to look in the mirror and think i'm hot instead of just cute
as you can see, i want alot of things
but it feels good to want to strive for something again
life is subjective in the sense
i have to believe i can make this happen

the problem with any of this working out is that sometimes i think i crave touch more than life itself, but right now all i need i some fucking self-containment
goblintcat:
That is a GREAT plan! I'm trying something similar myself. If I understand what your aiming for, it's to get your OWN life under control. Being able to do the things that you know are good for you and to get back to a time in your life when you felt good and strong and...alive.

Well, at least that's what I want to do. I seem to be failing quite miserably at it but I'm going to keep on trying.

So, if you need moral support, let me know. I'll be that little voice in your corner saying "Yay you!!!!"

Everyone needs that from time to time. wink
ouioui:
Hi I saw your comments on the tattoo group. Most of my tattoo's have been done by Mav Mess at Deluxe Tattoo in PDX. It isn't one of the big trendy shops but it is very clean and old school. He is incredible and very respectful. Good luck...

deluxetattooparlor.com

biggrin

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