piratestitch

Something a little less positive. The last few days have been a self reflection period for sure. With some recent events bringing to light my dating life. It has come to my attention that most if not all of the woman I have dated are in-fact not capable of making me nervous. At first glance that may be a good thing but I miss the butterflies. I think a relationship is great when both partners can challenge each-other (of-course in a positive way.) I want to feel something when I am with them that electric feeling. Its not that I am not attracted to the woman I have dated but rather that they just can't keep up with where my mind is at. Part of me is scared that I have done this to myself by not having the balls to approach the woman I know could challenge me and the other part (lets face it the complete package is hard to find and when you do find it its hard to approach) Lately I know its been hard for me to approach woman in general but really its a recent event. The other thing I have noticed is that I have been becoming more cynical and wonder really is that woman even out there. I know I am not a bad person I treat people well I do what I can to help my friends I am passionate about the things and people in my life and I take care of myself. Above all I am still a very curious person and I want to learn. My patience is wearing thin and I keep asking myself where is she?

With all of this said I am happy that my life is so great. It would be nice to have someone to share it with and I guess my sadness is in all the people that have given up on themselves. The breading of cynical beeings had been one of the greatest down falls of human kind. Finding another person that is confident and just content to be is hard everyone is surrounded by the things that caused them pain the things that have taken innocence away from them and the forget what its like to just be. Now you see I am just rambling away. Not really sure what I am saying its like a drunken discussion of the universes except I am not drunk and its not about the universe. HAHA maybe I am just at work bored.

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