piratenate

So you know how it is when you just plan on something in life? Like being funny...I like to be funny. And I'd like to be funny in a very free way, touching on whatever the hell I feel like! And I will.
This seems like the kind of site where people like to be uninhibited. Really? Yeah, I know...understatement of the decade. But it sure is refreshing to just see everybody comfy in their own skin. Hell, I even posted a picture of my own penis just to join in the fun...can't believe I did, but hey. I mean, this is just such a repressed country I guess when you compare it to most other ones. Nobody likes to acknowledge that anyone even has "naughty bits"...we're all just smooth Barbie & Ken dolls. And unfortunately because of that, just to see REAL nudity is freaking expensive unless it's your significant other. Currently I have no "other", significant or otherwise. Over the years, I've been to strip clubs plenty, and they are fun, but I've also mastered the art of spending very little once I'm there..tough to do when the girls are all doing their best to lure you into the back for a lapdance...or as I like to call it, paying $20 for a Britney Spears song and 3 minutes of boobs in your face. Ok, sure, I've done it...but now I'll just enjoy the stage show, throw maybe $20 worth of dollar bills at the girls over a 1-hour period of time, and then make a hasty exit. Voila!
But speaking of expensive.....let's talk about Tiger Woods. He makes my confessions above seem like a Sunday school lesson. Here's a guy who we all thought had it all...and we were right - he sure did "have it all". So I take comfort knowing that even being the top paid athlete means nothing. Nada. He couldn't keep it in his pants, and now he'll pay. And this blog now comes full circle, because in the back of my mind, I somehow find that funny. Sorry, Tiger! You shoulda known better. More blogs to come soon....next topic - talking on the cellphone in the grocery store. Jerks.