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JXN

Member Since 2004

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Sunday Feb 14, 2010

Feb 13, 2010
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so, sg, what's your favorite way to kill a chicken?

i've got this rhode island red that is just a total fuckwad, really abuses the hens, and i'm ready to kill him. and, as many as i've killed, i've never really found a way that i especially like, that seems sufficiently humane. i guess cutting their heads off is classic, but in my experience, that's just messy - their bodies spazz and run and spew blood everywhere. grabbing them by the head and swinging is pretty effective, but not 100% - you have to hit that sweet spot after full death and before the head pops off, in which case, see previous.

maybe i'll put his head on the chopping block and just hit it with a hammer. quick and reliable, but messy? hmm.

you got a better idea?


ARRR!!!
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
pygmy:
the swinging method. not 100%, right, but go a little farther than you think you need to, and you won't have to deal with zombie chickens and you won't have as much mess about 70% of the time, anyway.
Feb 14, 2010
piracy:
the swinging is definitely a visceral experience. you really feel the bones separate in your hand. but too little swinging and you've got a flapping bird, and too much swinging and you've got a flapping bird. i guess it just takes some practice, damnit.

but i'll be glad to snap this rapists neck. he's turned the other rooster, a beautifull huge buff orpington into this huge jackass, i had to kick the fucker like five times in the head to keep him away from the door while i stole some of his food to feed the red, who is in isolation.

i was so sick of the constant chicken rape. it's turning me more feminist than animal rights-y. what can i say, sometimes i have to kick even chickens i LIKE in the face.


ARRR!!!
Feb 14, 2010

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