PBI: Mock Madness 2008
The Final Four:
1) Coin Flip After squeaking by against the 8 seed Women's Seeding in sqeaker 7-6, our favorite moves onto the Final Four. This method will be as simple as it sounds. I flip a coin to determine the winner of each round. Heads will be the higher seed for each round. Totally random. It's mildly tedious, midly interesting and completely unoriginal. But it's how we decide who kicks off in every single football game in America, so it's the Favorite.
VS
4) Google Fight In another close call over the 12th seed College Humor Power Ranking, 7-5, the 4th overall seed Google Fight moves on to the face the juggernaut. In this method I will do exactly as it sounds, I will plug into Google Fight both school's Name and team Nickname and whichever scores higher will win. For example Wisconsin Badgers vs Davidson Wildcats: 1,610,000 - 28. Yes, 28. Who the hell is Davidson?!?!? This, to me, is the most interesting method left. And I think it the most fun as well. Sometimes it will be obvious as the above example shows, but it will lend itself to some interesting and surprising results. It will not be to boring and is a fairly original method. Plus those stick figures fighting will keep me entertained throughout the entirety of picking my bracket!
23) Graduation Rate of Athletes In an 8-2 blowout over the 18 seed Three Point Shooting Percentage, graduation rate is the lowest seed to make it to the Final Four. This method shall be used as simply as it sounds, whichever school graduates more of it's athletes will win. It will lend itself to some big surprises and get rid of some teams that no one likes anyway, the entire Big 10+1, like anyone in the Big Ten can handle that much math.
VS
6) Cheerleader Uniforms In the second biggest blowout of the entire tournament the raging horde of cheerleaders pom-pomed to death the 3 seed, and my personal favorite, Magic 8 ball. I am still saddened by this. But life goes on. Now vote carefully here, this method does not mean that the hottest cheerleaders win, nor does it mean that the skimpiest uniforms win either. It will be a balance of both sex appeal and fashion, using female assistance I will determine which teams cheerleaders will win. This will be highly tedious, completely boring and will be not at all what you think it is.
So there they are, the Final Four. And whichever one of these comes out on top shall be the method I use to pick my 2009 Tournament Bracket. Choose wisely, my fate is in your hands.
Voting ends on the 1st, you fools!
The Final Four:
1) Coin Flip After squeaking by against the 8 seed Women's Seeding in sqeaker 7-6, our favorite moves onto the Final Four. This method will be as simple as it sounds. I flip a coin to determine the winner of each round. Heads will be the higher seed for each round. Totally random. It's mildly tedious, midly interesting and completely unoriginal. But it's how we decide who kicks off in every single football game in America, so it's the Favorite.
VS
4) Google Fight In another close call over the 12th seed College Humor Power Ranking, 7-5, the 4th overall seed Google Fight moves on to the face the juggernaut. In this method I will do exactly as it sounds, I will plug into Google Fight both school's Name and team Nickname and whichever scores higher will win. For example Wisconsin Badgers vs Davidson Wildcats: 1,610,000 - 28. Yes, 28. Who the hell is Davidson?!?!? This, to me, is the most interesting method left. And I think it the most fun as well. Sometimes it will be obvious as the above example shows, but it will lend itself to some interesting and surprising results. It will not be to boring and is a fairly original method. Plus those stick figures fighting will keep me entertained throughout the entirety of picking my bracket!
23) Graduation Rate of Athletes In an 8-2 blowout over the 18 seed Three Point Shooting Percentage, graduation rate is the lowest seed to make it to the Final Four. This method shall be used as simply as it sounds, whichever school graduates more of it's athletes will win. It will lend itself to some big surprises and get rid of some teams that no one likes anyway, the entire Big 10+1, like anyone in the Big Ten can handle that much math.
VS
6) Cheerleader Uniforms In the second biggest blowout of the entire tournament the raging horde of cheerleaders pom-pomed to death the 3 seed, and my personal favorite, Magic 8 ball. I am still saddened by this. But life goes on. Now vote carefully here, this method does not mean that the hottest cheerleaders win, nor does it mean that the skimpiest uniforms win either. It will be a balance of both sex appeal and fashion, using female assistance I will determine which teams cheerleaders will win. This will be highly tedious, completely boring and will be not at all what you think it is.
So there they are, the Final Four. And whichever one of these comes out on top shall be the method I use to pick my 2009 Tournament Bracket. Choose wisely, my fate is in your hands.
Voting ends on the 1st, you fools!
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
He told me that I should get one for Halloween last year.
I said "NO FUCKING WAY."
The end.
It is now Coin Flips vs. Graduation Rates!