pilar

i am officially sick...
i've got the body aches..
the sneezing fits...
stuffy nose voice...which is always attractive..

dreams last night included the following:
*pregnant pilar
*ex-boyfriend
*alcohol binge
*heartbreak

so i'm the queen of getting mixed signals and it sucks...maybe i'm just bad at interpreting things...Although I am pretty much convinced my soulmate lies in the sf bay area...I try my luck at the draw here in the midwest...telling myself I should keep my friends and lovers apart, it never seems to actually work out that way...one of said romances has been grooving on for almost 3 years now...that on again off again swing that everyone goes through once in their lives. I can quote him as saying "its just that i want to be with you and around you but i feel like that isnt where i truly should be if my heart is telling me something else"
so at this point the best thing for me to do is say...
you'll miss me when i'm gone...

tell me i'm right guys!?!?
p.s. this is too much to ponder with a headcold in full effect!