We all have those friends, or associates, that make you wonder how they made it this far in life. They usually manage to do something, on a daily basis, that makes you pull a stupid face, and say, WTF?! If you cant think of someone that this pertains to, the you are most likely that guy. I happen to be fortunate enough to work with many people that are lacking common sense. This brief story that you are about to read happened to me recently, and it left me speechless for a while.
The area that I work in does not have regular bathrooms. They only have port-a-potties. Port-a-potties are great. Especially when it is 100 degrees, and they have not been cleaned for a while. So, I am sitting in the port-a-potty, handling my business and sweating like a hooker in church. In case you are one of the fortunate ones that have never used a port-a-potty, they have a plastic lock on the inside so no one can walk in on you. When the door is unlocked, the outside of the door has a green dot showing, as if to say, Im open. Come on in. When the door is locked, the outside has a red dot showing, as if to say STOP, you want no part of whats going on in here. I have the door locked. I periodically hear people walking up to the port-a-potty. They obviously see that the door is locked, and turn around to find another port-a-potty. All but one person realizes the door is locked. This unamed person ignores the red dot, and decides to give the door a jerk. I hold my breath, but the lock holds strong. Im in the clear, right? Wrong. On the second jerk, I see the lock bend, almost to the point of breaking, but once again the lock does its job.
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Ok, this idiot has to realize that the door is locked now, right? Wrong again. On the third jerk he had to use two hands, and put his whole body weight into it, because the lock didnt just break. It snapped completely of the bolts. So, now I am sitting there, feeling violated, staring at this guy that has a blank look on his face. Im expecting some sort of apology. I dont think that is too much to ask for at this point. What does he say? Jeez, you should really lock the door. Then he turns around and walks away. You know how when something happens to you, and you cant think of a response at that second, but later you think of a million different comebacks? That didnt happen. I have yet to think of a suitable response to this. WTF?
The area that I work in does not have regular bathrooms. They only have port-a-potties. Port-a-potties are great. Especially when it is 100 degrees, and they have not been cleaned for a while. So, I am sitting in the port-a-potty, handling my business and sweating like a hooker in church. In case you are one of the fortunate ones that have never used a port-a-potty, they have a plastic lock on the inside so no one can walk in on you. When the door is unlocked, the outside of the door has a green dot showing, as if to say, Im open. Come on in. When the door is locked, the outside has a red dot showing, as if to say STOP, you want no part of whats going on in here. I have the door locked. I periodically hear people walking up to the port-a-potty. They obviously see that the door is locked, and turn around to find another port-a-potty. All but one person realizes the door is locked. This unamed person ignores the red dot, and decides to give the door a jerk. I hold my breath, but the lock holds strong. Im in the clear, right? Wrong. On the second jerk, I see the lock bend, almost to the point of breaking, but once again the lock does its job.
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Ok, this idiot has to realize that the door is locked now, right? Wrong again. On the third jerk he had to use two hands, and put his whole body weight into it, because the lock didnt just break. It snapped completely of the bolts. So, now I am sitting there, feeling violated, staring at this guy that has a blank look on his face. Im expecting some sort of apology. I dont think that is too much to ask for at this point. What does he say? Jeez, you should really lock the door. Then he turns around and walks away. You know how when something happens to you, and you cant think of a response at that second, but later you think of a million different comebacks? That didnt happen. I have yet to think of a suitable response to this. WTF?