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pica_pica

Canada

Member Since 2004

Followers 55 Following 91

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Thursday Nov 04, 2004

Nov 4, 2004
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well, that was rather morose and cryptic. I didn't really mean it to be, well not completely... I think it was more the fact that I myself, did not want to acknowledge the most recent happenings. I think it was / is just a leetle bit too much at the moment.

So I never mentioned the fact that also on Saturday night, as the four of us were waiting for a cab, my cell phone rang. It was 10:00pm. I look at my call display, and its coming in from the last of my long term friends. The woman friend that has been somewhat caught in the middle of this entire fiasco. I answer.
Her voice sounds shaky. Shes upset or perhaps angry or maybe both. Im instantly concerned, like something terrible has happened. I ask her whats going on, and once she hears that I am waiting for a cab with friends, she backs down and doesnt want to talk about it.
She eventually just says it though.
as a friend, Im asking you to please just leave she-who-will-referred-to-as-her alone.

I was like huh?
As it turns out, she is referring to the angry email I sent out on Friday morning saying basically have you lost your mind?. she-who-will-referred-to-as-her showed it to her on Friday night.
Well, taken out of context without the history of the 3 days leading up to me finally sending that email, I suppose it would look like a complete asshole thing to do. Even now, I wish I could have toned it down a bit, but I do not feel my anger was unwarranted. She should have taken the cat home on Wednesday night and thats all there is to it.
Well my friend on the phone on a Saturday night feels nothing but sorrow and grief for she-who-will-referred-to-as-her, because I am such a terrible person and have been so cruel to her.
I started to try to give her a background to the anger behind the email that she saw, but as soon as I started to explain what had transpired up to that day regarding Gimpy, she got angry and cut me off. Didnt wanna hear me badmouthing she-who-will-be-referred-to-as-her. It obviously was not a good time for such a conversation and we ended it.

The next day, I responded via email, explaining that I had no choice but to clarify my position.

I really felt her anger was unjustified because it was based on the last 5% of an incredibly complicated week. I could not, can not handle any more injustices. The emails I had been sending prior to that one were full of compassion and worry, and Im sure she never saw those ones. No, only the last one, out of context.

Well, I got a response to that email last night, and basically it was a goodbye. She said she fundamentally disagrees with my approach on these things, and had reached a point where she needed to take a break from me. She needed to be without stress or conflict for a while, and for me to take care of myself.

And then there were none.




You know, I suppose for anybody reading this, they would think that I have been leaving out an incredibly important snippet of information. Leaving out something that would explain this sort of treatment towards me. Unfortunately, thats the hard part. I have been incredibly honest with my posts here, and quite often I probably put out more personal information than I should, but I have never left anything out. The hard part is actually living what you are thinking about right now, and thats me just sitting here now saying over and over
What the fuck? WHY?
So if you feel like you are missing something, join my club.

Ill send you a secret decoder ring in the mail.
It's broken though.

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