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phoenixbane

Huntsville, AL

Member Since 2004

Followers 3 Following 9

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Sunday Jan 18, 2004

Jan 18, 2004
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sometimes the most important words said are the words not said... here is something from an alternate journal universe of mine...


I float entirely through this ocean of emotion unguided. Misdirection my only source of motivation and I find the bottom of the ocean floor. I ask myself why I'm here, walking along the floor of this vast realm when I could be moving much faster in the higher depths. The answer is simple. Because I feel I must, nothing is ever easy, nor should it be. At least that's how I feel. Easy tasks make the goal less appreciated. Difficult goals yield appreciated, and sometimes satisfiable results. So I drag my anchor of self-accusations with me along this deep dark ocean floor through the corridors of reef. Though the path be difficult, I find myself wanting to walk it alone. I will drown not my friends as I care for them too much to drag them to me. I keep no close council, no close consort, save myself. I am the only one who can help me now, I am the only one who can reach my goal. The goal, to become someone who can give those I care about the strength they truly deserve. I am not yet strong enough, nor am I close... in life or in strife. Thus I continue on my quest, drowning myself to make myself stronger.

More Blogs

  • 02.14.04
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    Saturday Feb 14, 2004

    Today my heart was such as the weather. Cold and dreary, the silvery.…
  • 02.08.04
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    Sunday Feb 08, 2004

    at work till 4 am, anyways, just felt like putting something here... …
  • 02.07.04
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    Sunday Feb 08, 2004

    I feel so alone...
  • 02.05.04
    1

    Friday Feb 06, 2004

    meh, monsooning here tonight... flooding, however you wanna put it...…
  • 02.04.04
    0

    Wednesday Feb 04, 2004

    (HED) P.E. - Swan Dive... that's about how I feel right now
  • 02.01.04
    1

    Sunday Feb 01, 2004

    meh, got the shit bitten out of me today at work by a cat thanks to i…
  • 01.31.04
    1

    Saturday Jan 31, 2004

    ...yep...
  • 01.28.04
    1

    Wednesday Jan 28, 2004

    got my nips pierced today... pic in pics section, not a good one but …
  • 01.25.04
    0

    Sunday Jan 25, 2004

    well, wednesday I'm getting metal put in my chest...
  • 01.23.04
    1

    Friday Jan 23, 2004

    Got 2 AFI albums today that I ordered a week ago... Art of drowning a…

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