My mother lives far from me because my step dad (the political thing to call him) got a job offer to work for NASA therefore, I didn't see my mother yesterday . TBH she was a pretty shitty mom and made a lot of mistakes. I think the older I get the more I come to the realization that my mother fucked up a lot of things for my childhood. Including but not limited too blowing all of my deseaced fathers social security money on QVC and bullshit instead of saving it. Making more then 60k.. as a house hold. Things like that really upset me. Infact they don't upset me, they make me bitter to raise a child on this fucked up planet already.
I also had to visit my grandmother in the hospital today. She was with my grandfather for over 55 years and he passed away about 6 years ago and she hasn't been the same since. She is slowly dying both internally, and externally. It's so sad to see the woman that pretty much raised me deteriorate like that. It's one of the reasons why I never wanna grow old, Growing old sucks. I saw my Grandfather fight Diabetes for 10 years. I shared way too many hours in a hospital fuck that. Let me die as soon as I start giving out. Brompton cocktail that bitch.
On a positive note, Keep your loved ones close to you. You never know when they will be gone. Appreciate your health and the life that you have now. Our youth is something to cherish . A lot of people lose it to cancer and other fucked up shit the world offers.
These are just intoxicated thoughts. While the ethanol passes through my liver <3
XOXO -Richard.
