phant0mas

"I can't live my life this way"
I'm am tired.
I'm tired of many things but mostly, I'm tired of making excusing and running from the truth.
I'm tired of of smoking.
I'm tired of running out of breath from climbing a flight of stairs.
I'm tired of not getting a good night's sleep because I have sleep apnea (I'm sure in no small part due to smoking)
I'm tired of making excuses about not exercising.
I'm tired of not exercising.
I'm tired of being fat. This is not to say there is anything wrong with a gut or a belly or what have you but I know my cholesterol levels and glucose levels are too high.
I'm tired of being ashamed of things I did in the past.
I'm tired, most tired, of pretending to be so striong. Tired of going home at night and being alone because I think I have something to prove by being ok with being alone. Pretending to be positive 100% of the time, of liking everyone, of being the nice guy.
I'm tired of saying I'll do it and not doing it!
I can't live my life this way!
"There's things in my life Imma let go starting tonight"
This is my new theme.