After a five year hiatus, I am coming back to the Suicide Girls community, and I couldn't be more excited. Please do take the time to read this, as I am about to bear my soul.
For the past five years I have been in one toxic relationship after the other. A common theme in these relationships were insecurities. My partners would project their doubts of themselves onto me, and being an empath.. I knew nothing more than to absorb that energy. I wanted to release them of worry and fear, but I slowly became consumed by it myself.
Being shamed for being in the sex work industry was something I became used to. I had to look myself in the mirror and decide I was done. I was done being manipulated. I was done feeling inadequate. But getting to that point did not come easy. I had to learn that I did not need to rely on the acceptance of one person for my happiness, even if I was a hopeless romantic. Today, I have fallen in love with myself.
I no longer see the obstacles that were holding me back anymore. I am able to visualize the life I want. I am no longer crippled with self doubt and hate. I really have a purpose. I have a dream to follow. And this is why I want to make a comeback. I wasn't ready to give up my dream of being a Suicide Girl. I am not ready to walk away, because I have so much left to give. I have perspective and depth that I never imagined possible. I want to help encourage anyone in the community to be true to themselves. I want to be apart of a community that saw in me what I couldn't see in my darkest times. Suicide Girls brought me a family and I want to do everything I can to show my gratitude. I'll be posting very often, as well as going live so I can get back in the right direction and reconnect with all my friends here.
This is not the last of me. I will let no one keep me down, or stand in my way. Because I have a new sense of confidence I could have never imagined possible when I was just going pink at 18.
I will be shooting another set soon and I couldn't be more excited. Thank you guys for all your support and I love this community more than words can say.
until next time <3
