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peopleskills

Houston, TX

Member Since 2008

Followers 22 Following 10

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Monday Jun 01, 2009

May 31, 2009
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it's been a week. oops.

Been planning this big trip to Yosemite. Ten days, and the last three are back country backpacking days, with the last day being the climb up Half Dome and coming down to the valley floor. I'm excited and scared shitless. It's 30 miles to cover (in three days) packing everything in, with that brutal climb up Half dome's cables punctuating the rigor of carrying all of life's necessities over all that scenery--I hope to God I don't fall over and die at mile 12.

Anxiously awaiting news about financial aid...and hoping to all hell this works out. I have absolutely no interest in taking on any more retail challenges. Quite frankly, just about everyone who has ever been to a retail store has acted like an asshole to the underpaid (albeit mostly grossly under qualified) salesperson. We have all taken out our frustrations on the poor guy or girl whose only responsibility is to get that pair of 11.5's out of the back. I have no idea how I put up with it for that long. Seriously--people with money to spend can be extremely insulting.

Lastly--hit on an idea that kinda knocked me on my ass. Today, as I was at about mile 5, with my feet screaming from a combination of breaking in new shoes and carrying my fat ass, I thought to myself that that moment was the first time in years I was thinking of absolutely nothing but that moment. My feet and the grand humbling crags smashed into existence by angry fault lines and turbulent earth. That's it. That moment of peace fed me better than anything I've tasted since I played in bands all those years ago. I guess all I needed was to distract myself from, well, myself, for long enough to realize that whatever I was looking for was following me all along and only waiting for me to turn around and see it. I had been searching for something to fill the heavy void of imbalance in food, and beer, and friends, and television, and video games, and planning, and even music...and as soon as I finally shut my mouth and paid attention I felt it.

I will sleep well tonight. And be refreshed tomorrow. It's been a while since I could say that.

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